Stealing Me Softly
by Fuchsia.Grasshopper
Summary: "And I've seen your face, I've seen you change." She whispered. This was more than a game, it involved matters of the heart. Loki would find the key to come inside and play. "It's true we're always covering our lies, some of us just grow so strange." He hissed in her ear. Oh yes, inside wanted out, and when that happened, Loki would play. DarkLoki/OC
1. Chapter 1

**Alright, here we go again. The third kick at the cat for LOAN, in which I hope you will all enjoy. Some things are going to look familiar as we progress, but that will be on purpose I assure you.**

**I own nothing but my OC**

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Loki could hear the voice in his head again. He wandered the halls, looking ominous so people would avoid him. Just a few more paces and he would be in the safety of his room. It had been going on like this for some time now. At first he simply brushed the issue aside, contending to the thought that it was normal to hear things, but it had gotten to the point that he could no longer ignore these small cries. They occurred more often these days, and at unpredictable moments, causing him to wince unexpectedly. His brother had voiced concern on this matter to him before, pulling him aside to asked demanding questions. Loki made some quick excuse that he knew Thor would buy into, but if it had been his mother, she would not have been one so easy to turn away.

His room welcomed him back with a dark kiss as he shut the door behind him. The willowy green curtains floated and danced as the gentle breeze tried to enter his quarters. Using magic, he lit the candles on his bedside table, while landing on his mattress rather unceremoniously. Even his room was in a state of disaster, growing dishevelled much like his hair as he rubbed his temples to ease the dull ache. He was forced to lie down in the unmade sheets that were strewn about the bed and the floor. A small voice was calling to him without realization. It was the voice of a female child, small and innocent like a dove. She spoke of matters that were unimportant, as was to be expected from youth. She spoke coherently into his head, and he knew she was not of Asgard. It seemed improbable that such a thing could occur. He had heard his father talk about prayers, but this too seemed like a false conclusion. The way she spoke to him was unknowingly, as if she was speaking these words privately to herself. He thought to answer, but was unsure if the words would reach her. He was well educated in telepathy, but to only those at a short distance. Even if he somehow managed that feat, he was unsure on what words of comfort to bring to a child. Children frightened him; not in the sense of real fear, but he was uncomfortable around them and fancied never having a family of his own. Things change in due time, his mother would say to him and Thor, for his brother also sought a different life than wife and children.

"_I could hear Olive talking about me in school. She thinks I'm a freak. I can hear what people are thinking before they say them. Did she know, would she tell? My parents don't know and I am too scared to tell them."_

Before Loki could stop himself, he thought of an answer, _"Sometimes it is best to keep those things a secret little one. They do not think you are a freak, they are only jealous."_ Why he chose these words, he was uncertain. Perhaps it was because he had these similar feelings when he was a child.

"_Can you hear me"_ It sounded as a gasp, "_Where are you?"_

"_I am but a distant voice to guide you. What is your name child?"_

"_My mother tells me not to talk with strangers." _

He merely rolled his eyes at the juvenile answer. _"I swear to you that I mean no harm."_ That was the first time he had used those words in a truthful sentence.

"_You have to tell me yours in return."_

"_Deal." _He smirked, almost having fun.

"_My name is Joan. What's yours?"_

Joan? A bizarre name to him, and he was certain it originated from Midgard. For a moment, he wondered if it would be a wrong decision to present her with his real name. More often than not, people knew his reputation, but she was only a small child after all, "_Hello Joan, my name is Loki."_

He heard a small giggle come from her, and he wondered what had been said to make her so amused, _"My puppy's name is Loki." _Oh how charming the family dog was named after him,_ "Wait, is it really you I am talking to?"_ He figured she must have been looking at her pet animal.

"_A mere coincidence darling." _Had she been anything other than another worldly toddler, he might have considered tricking her into thinking he was the animal. She was only a child though, and such schemes were beneath him.

"_You talk funny, like a King or something."_ He froze momentarily, hating and loving the word King all at once because of the turmoil behind the subject, _"Can I see you?"_

"_I'm afraid that isn't plausible, but do not fret child, if you should need me, you only need to call."_ He sat up against his headboard, perplexed at why he was playing along with this game. He would invest his time into this situation, until he grew increasingly bored and would abandon her like he always did when a new challenge presented itself. A child would never grow attached to him; they grew distracted too easily as it was. It would be a passing thing, something to settle his mind until she would no longer seek to disturb him.

"_I'll call for you every day." _She said stubbornly, and Loki had half a mind to believe it.

"_Good night Loki."_

He half smiled in the black of his room, feeling warmed by a child's sweet words, _"Sweet well, princess."_

ooOOoo

"Brother, you've hardly touched your food." Thor noted to a sour Loki at the breakfast hall the next day. His entire good mood had been shaken out of him harshly as soon as he had risen. It had been such a typical morning, one of which Loki would have favored to escape had it been possible. He had been awoken by Thor rather nosily with rough poundings on his door. No amount of stuffing his head under the pillow would have been enough to drown that out. He had almost used a silencing charm, but Thor had already busted open the door, and dragged Loki down for first meal. It was one of those days where they would speak to their father about Kingly duties which should be upheld and fulfilled when on the throne.

"I am distracted." He replied tersely.

"You are not having headaches again are you?" Thor said too loudly, in which their mother picked up on.

"Headaches, Loki have you been ill?" She asked in concern, her face creasing. His mother in sadness always found to bother him, and the look did not become her so well as a pleasant smile did when it graced her lips.

"They have ceased." He said while sparing a dark look at Thor, "I have been to the healing room and all is well. No need to burden yourself mother."

She laughed, "It is no burden to me Loki, for you are my son." She said it so frankly, and in plain comfort that it always soothed his shaking rage.

"Will father not be joining us?" Thor asked bewildered as he buttered another roll for himself.

"You father has been kept busy, but will discuss matters with you later in the day."

Loki cared little of these 'discussions' as they were so delicately called. He felt like an intruder, standing at the side by Thor as Odin began to speak. The words echoed around them, but seemed to reject Loki, bumping off him and directly aiming for Thor. What hope did he have for the Throne when he was second youngest? Surely it was a small feud amongst all royal families of different realms, but Loki could not help but think it affected him more because of his father's words, always speaking to them as they would both be Kings. It was not nor would it ever be a dream succeeded and to Loki, he felt like he was only being built up for failure.

"_Loki?"_ The small called so suddenly, that he winced and had to rub his eyes to cover for the action. He did not take her word on returning to call him so soon. Perhaps it was because he knew little of the value of his own word; he was never one to hold it fourth so likely.

"Are you well my son?" Evidently he had not covered well enough, for the Queen sat, looking disturbed by his state.

"Just tired from being woken up so abruptly." Blaming things on Thor was his favorite pass time, "Would you all excuse me please." He stood, swiping his kerchief down on the table before pushing his chair in. He remained acting as calm as he could before he was free into the halls, where he began to run his hands furiously through his hair.

"_What is it you want Joan?"_ He ground out rudely, but the child paid no notice.

"_Oh good I thought you disappeared." _Relief was in her voice, and Loki felt his own brows pull together in confusion. She was already concerning herself with his whereabouts, and he could only conclude that children were clingy.

"_I said I would never leave you, now what is it you want?"_ He insisted, thoroughly annoyed that he had to keep reminding her of their truce.

"_Just to talk. I'm in the nurse's infirmary at school because I hurt my knee."_ The word nurse was lost on his part, but the word 'infirmary' led him to assume it was something of a healing ward.

"_How did you hurt your knee?"_ He asked, while trying to keep focus. Having a mental conversation with child realms away made it difficult to stay focused and he nearly collided with other persons once or twice. They tried to reframe from giving him hard looks because he was a Prince, but that did not stop the few who expressed freely their opinions of him.

"_I was outside, and I…fell down."_ She supplied lamely.

"_You fell suddenly? I should chastise you to watch where you are going, but somehow I do not think that is the problem."_ He knew it wasn't, for he had used such untactful excuses when he was a child. How many times had he been brought back to the citadel with unexplainable injuries? He was a prideful being, even when young and he couldn't tolerate the laughs and taunts he would receive after losing miserably in sparring against Thor or his friends.

"_I don't know what chastise means."_ She grumbled, _"And I do watch where I am going, but others seem to always be in my way!"_

"_Joan, you cannot allow what others think to bother you. It gives them power, and with that power they feel they have control to make you feel bad. Be strong, and hold your head high."_

"_But, you don't know what it's like to be different. You are so confident and…and, popular. I'm sure everyone likes you."_

His face turned quizzical, almost wanting to laugh at her for such a poor deduction of his character, but paused in remembering she was only an innocent. _"Being different can be difficult to live with, but you can learn to be happy with it." _Something he had yet to master as well.

"_What do you look like?"_ She asked suddenly.

"_Joan, I do not think we have time to discuss this. You should focus on healing your injury."_ His eyes nearly rolled, but with no one to see, he didn't bother with the effort.

"_The nurse left me here with a bandage on my knee, and now I have to wait while she calls my mom. I'm bored, and it will only take a second, please?!"_

He internally sighed, this time rolling his eyes. He didn't exactly have minutes to spare to be entertaining the notion of what he looked like to a small child. Why she was interested in his physical appearance at all was beyond strange to him. He supposed it gave her comfort to have something to imagine. A sight was comforting if nothing less, _"I have dark black hair…green eyes and pale skin."_ He thought while shrugging at that incredulous question.

"_You sound pretty." _She said in a dreamy voice. He balked at being described as 'pretty' and his face creased into a frown.

"_Yes well, that is very flattering." _He responded blandly. He had just stepped outside into the gardens. A fountain was trickling down into a pool of water with tranquility that it brought him ease He sat down, letting his fingers run through the crisp water while waiting for her reply. The sun was striking him at an odd angle, and he felt the flesh of his cheek heat to a higher temperature. He was never one to sit out in the open, and evidently the people were aware of this matter, for he received all strange looks delivered his way. It was his Kingdom as well, was he not allowed sitting at peace among the gardens? He wanted to yell and shout at the onlookers with ferocity. Thor could commit this very act, and no one would bat an eye other than the females who would flock to sit with him. Asgard was a cold home; he'd never felt so distant in a place when he was present. He would reside so deep into himself sometimes, just to escape the reality of which he had been forced to survive in. How many Princes would ever complain? There was duty and privilege, but he supposed none ever did, which made him a rare flower in the bunch; the one with thorns that no one was willing to pluck.

"_Oh sorry Loki, I forgot to say good bye! My mom came to take me home, and I had to hide you away from her."_

He smiled shortly at her sudden presence in his mind, and tried to imagine what her life was like. He suspected she ran in a small circle of friends, but she had the support of her parents. Loki felt bad for ever resenting his own, but it sometimes seemed like he wasn't a high priority on their to-do list. _"It is all right Joan. I am your support, not the other way around. Go now and sleep well."_

"_I have to eat first!"_ She cried, _"But I promise to sleep good." _

She was gone from him without a word after that, and Loki felt a great emptiness over take him every time her prodding voice disappeared. Even though he had only spoken with her for two days, he had listened to her for weeks much longer and he felt he knew all of her problems, like a thin novel with not much story to plot through. The transgressions of a child were something unfamiliar to him, and he would have to do his best to listen, while giving sound advice that she could comprehend. He had a tugging feeling in his gut that it would be him whom sleep would evade this night.

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**I wrote a second chapter to create more of a feel, so read on or stop and leave a review if you like. At this point I am writing this story for my peace of mind, to feel I've done LOAN some justice. Loki is friendly now, but bare in mind he hasn't been though the events of the Thor movie yet. I also would find it strange to make Dark Loki act mean to a child. He's a villain, but not a sadist!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC**

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Loki had now been in contact with little Joan for nearly an Asgardian year. He wasn't sure how time worked where she was (He assumed Midgard) in which case only perhaps a month would have changed for her. She was as young and naïve as always, but to Loki it brought queer comfort. He certainly had kept up the charade much longer than he had initially intended. Every day he would battle with himself to stop answering her, but each time her small voice cooed to him, he weakened and answered any or all of her questions. Most were worthless and of unimportance to really help her in life, but this was the working mind of a child, and he was forced to endure. The more he complained, the more he found himself compelled to answer her, and the ends didn't add up. He thought it strange that she clung so tightly to his every witty answer. Some days he just expected her not to call for his help, that she had matured and moved on from ever heeding a voice a distance away, but she was incorrigible, staying adamant with talking to him. Because of the difference in times of where they resided, she would wake him up in the middle of the night without meaning too. He had only ever scolded her once, but her watery voice had made him feel instant regret…and dread that she would not speak to him. It made him question when had that happened; when had he started to care if he had the company of a child or not? It was bizarre, such an occurrence that no one would ever understand. She was a friend with whom he held no connection with other than circumstance and the similarities of her childhood to his that bound them.

"Brother, I have wonderful news!" Thor said triumphantly, momentarily breaking his focus. Thor came trumping down the stairs of the library, with his band of warriors following. Loki gained a bland expression, hating every time they dragged him along on some other adventure, when none wanted him there except for Thor. Fandral attempted a smile as did Volstagg, but Sif spared no such treatment for him.

"What news do you bring Thor?" He asked, though with no genuine curiosity.

"Father is sending us on a mission to Midgard!"

His reaction must not have been what Thor was hoping for, for Loki stayed in his seat, sparing a cough and turning his eyes to the ceiling, "Oh how fun, but do you honestly need my presence?"

"Yes, there is an ancient relic that has been discovered; a rock depicting a timeline of the Great War with Father. To him it seemed indecent that the humans had ever etched such a thing, and he would like it brought back to the citadel. Such sketches of Frost Giants and Asgardians alike is not for their eyes to see."

Loki frowned tightly, looking almost disgusted, "You don't need me with you for that."

"Well, we could run into an unforeseen trouble, and you are good at getting us out of tight situations." Fandral smiled, before he wiped it from his face from the dead look Loki had shot him.

"Hmm, so I am to be an escape route, nothing more. That is tempting."

"Please brother, think on it! If we finish early, we can explore Midgard before we have to return back."

He reluctantly agreed if only for a chance to cause mischief amongst the mortals, should time be on his side. They did not go so heavily armed; in fact, they were given the garbs of mortals, to blend in with the time period. Loki scoffed at the uncomfortable pea overcoat he was forced to shrug into. He stuck with a strange back suit beneath, and turned away the hat when Fandral tried to place it on his head.

"What is the current year of Midgard?" Fandral had asked.

"1995. We however, are going to a desolate part of Norway, which means we shouldn't see too much change up in the mountains. I hear they have these things called automobiles." Sif said with strangled hesitation.

"Mortals!" Thor laughed, "Will they ever learn?!"

They arrived at the Bifrost, though Loki with a much more malcontent expression than the rest. Heimdall stood resolute as always, though a fracture of a smile graced the corner of his lip when he saw their clothing, "To Midgard?" He immediately assumed.

"Was it so obvious?" Volstagg said with a pout that made his beard sink a little lower down his chest until it reached his walrus gut.

"Not at all. The All Father informed me that you would be arriving. I merely saw you venturing here before you entered."

"Then let us not waste any more time with chatter. Off we go!" Thor declared. They spread out before the portal that would send them down to the blue realm. It had been nearly a millennium for any of them since they last set foot on Earth's soil. Loki had read small portions about the realm in books he studied, but nothing ever struck him as glamorous or magical like the other realms. It was nearly as sad existence as Helheim; the realism was tangible, and it was filled with lesser beings, born short lives only to die again.

The sharp blade entering the stone was like a hiss, and the portal was activated, sending them soaring through time and space at an enumerate cycle. Loki felt his breath momentarily leave him as his feet kicked down on soft packed snow. The others were scattered around him, catching wind while looking around the cold of Norway. It had been the only mortal country he had ever visited.

"How far will this search take us?" Sif said, her nose scrunched unpleasantly.

"We are close now, but we will have to play it quiet." Thor answer. Thor and quiet were two things that should never mingle in the same sentence. Now Loki understood why Fandral wanted him along for the excursion. Nothing would get done otherwise, and it was just a subtle hinting that any of Thor's friends dare not speak of in front of him.

They traveled into the small town, which would have otherwise been desolate if it weren't for such a large finding. A building was being blocked by a perimeter and surrounded with guards. This was evidently the place where the tablet was being hidden, and the mortals –not being so clever- made it easy to spot on high alert. The town was not so heavily populated, and the guarded building was set further away, making it easier for them not to attract the eyes of the common folk. They had walked between the rows of the wooden houses, which were puffing smoke profusely from the chimneys, until they came to the end of the village, where a chain link kept them barred outside.

"How do we get in?" Volstagg asked with a visage of hopelessness.

"Quickly and quietly. No need to cause large amounts of destruction now. We come, we take, and we leave, it's as simple as that." Sif stated firmly.

"Brother, give good concealment to escape us inside." Thor whispered.

Loki was with contempt, but complied as he utter a charm to keep them transparent to any mortal who dare look their way, "Keep close, those who venture from the group will turn visible once more." He instructed firmly. It was a lesson he had told them many times, but Thor and Volstagg in particular seemed to fall short considerably when obeying this order.

Fandral took a small blade to the fence, cutting them a way through in which Loki began to lead as they huddled behind him. They looked chilly to him, and he professed truthfully that the cold was not a bother to him. It never was an ailment he fell to his knees from, and he had no reasoning behind it, "What if-f we s-should get c-c-caught?" Fandral stuttered through his chattering teeth.

"Father gave me direct orders to not harm the humans, so we must only give injury in a dire situation." Thor earnestly answered.

"It wouldn't be much of a fair fight." Hogun said, "Mortals against us, that would make us look too cruel." Loki agreed about it not being a fair fight, but he had gained humor in the deduction at how weak the mortals really were, instead of feeling pity. They continued a dull trek down a white hallway, only nearly falling into one or two humans along the way. The door to the tablet was sealed shut, and with special magic that they had never set their sights on before. A number padded with keys was on the side wall to the door with no handle.

"How does this work; no handle or key?" Volstagg said with a vexed frown.

"I believe it requires a series of patterns with the keys in the correct order." Loki said while studying the device, "A new sorcery for mortals it would appear. I hear they call it science."

"Well, can you get us through the door?" Thor urged.

Loki gave him a shrouded look, "Doubtful. I need the correct code, and I suspect if a wrong one is placed, an alarm will go off. There are an innumerable number of combinations, and I am unaware of how many numbers it looks for."

"Now what?" Sif said impatiently, her foot tapping at a random pace.

"We break through. We can still cause damage to property, so long as humans are not involved." Thor and Volstagg stepped forward, pounding on the door by force with only their fists since they had not been permitted to come heavily armed. Loki thought quick to muffle the sounds with a spell just before their first rally of fists had collided with the door. Had he not done so, the whole facility would have been aware of their presence.

"Good thinking that was." Fandral said in appreciation.

Loki did not answer though. He had stepped back shortly from the group, his head pounding worse than he had ever dealt with. Every surge was like the tide coming in on rocks, and he couldn't resist grabbing his forehead with both hands. Joan was closer than he realized, and it confirmed his suspicions of her residing on Midgard. He couldn't make out her words; they were coming through so strong to the point he thought his ears would bleed. Blotches of black began to corrode his vision like ink on a page, but he could make out Sif's concerned face before him.

"Loki?" She called, but it was barely audible from the onslaught inside his mind. She reached a hand for his shoulder, and looked quite surprised when her hand traveled right through it, "Thor! Quickly, your brother." She called urgently.

The pounding on the door had stopped, and everyone was circling him, trying to get his attention while their hands went right through his person. Something was pulling at him, and he was slowly seeping towards it. He wasn't putting up a convincing fight, and he could admit that candidly. He saw surprised eyes before him, until he all but vanished out of the high security corridor. He felt like he was travelling by Bifrost, but all the sights he passed were of Midgard. His back landed gruffly on moist grass. The sky above him was black and crying. As the rain continued to pelt his surprised face, a crack of thunder deafened him from above. He slowly sat up, his body stiff in his waterlogged clothes. His immediate reaction was panic. Without the magical veil of his protection, the others would be visible in the faculty.

He took in his surroundings while the falling rain peppered him from on the ground. He was in a small fenced property, with a two story home before him. The siding was pale blue, stained with the wet rain as it trailed off the angular roof. He had a suspicion, as he called for her, _"Joan, what has you upset?"_

He winced just as swiftly as an answer came, _"My head hurt when you did that."_

"_I believe it is because I am closer than you might think. Go to your window." _He ordered, with no more desires to be left standing in the rain. He studied the silent house carefully, until a curtain moved in the second story, and a small persons head peeped out. He wasted no time in summoning his body up by the window. The small figure stepped back in fright, until he was inside the dry, toasted home. He shut the window behind him, before looking around the small room. His eyes traveled down and rested on the short figure that was cloaked in the darkness of the room. Her eyes lit up briefly when a jagged piece of lightening stretched across the sky, but he did not see her closely enough to see her face. When a loud shake of thunder followed, he heard a small squeak and had found something had attached itself to his waist. His eyes widened as he looked down at the child who was gripping him tightly in paralyzed fear.

"Joan, let go." He ordered while attempting to pry her small hands away. They seemed to only lock on in a tighter embrace, which was causing him some difficulty to breathe. Having enough of her childish behavior, he heaved her up and maneuvered her to her small white iron bed. He kneeled down to her eye level as she sat on her bed, rubbing her eyes with her wrists. Her door was shut, but he put a silencer spell on the room, before creating a ball of light in his hand. It illuminated her face, which was slightly chubby because of her young age. Her eyes were puffy from crying, and Loki couldn't help but think they reminded him of a lost doe in a meadow, as such a soft hazel they were. Her hair was light like toffee, and was a long mess all over her shoulders. She was dressed head to toe in a white cotton gown with long sleeves covering her arms. When his pupils traced back to her, she was staring intently at him. For the sake of humans, he supposed she was an adorable child, though she lacked the air of light that surrounded the cherubs of Asgard. She was dull if anything, and rather ordinary. Her button nose was glowing red from weeping, and her mouth was in a full pout. He was pulled from his thoughts abruptly when a tan hand was holding his one cheek, "I knew you were pretty." She whimpered slightly, still looking uncertain to the weather falling outside her window.

Her skin was hot opposed to his cold, and he felt in pain, suddenly wanting her away from him entirely. His large palm covered over her small hand, and he gently brought it back down to rest in her lap. She gazed at him with a rather flippant expression, both filled with lack of sleep and mild interest, "Are you real, or am I asleep, 'cause I feel too afraid to be sleeping."

Afraid, what was she afraid of? Certainly not him, or he prayed not, "What has startled you?" He said shrewdly.

"I hate thunder." Her face scrunched, and he was with chagrin that she may bawl before him.

"Well, that is one thing we have in common." He said slightly smirking to something she did not understand. Her fingers wrapped around his hand again, and he thought her clingy if nothing else. He could provide no comfort to a frightened child, thinking of himself as more of a cause than of savior.

"Can you stay with me?" Her voice was so small, that at first he wasn't sure if he had heard her correctly. His immediate answer was to be no, for he needed to get back to his brother and troop before they were discovered. She was a dog howling in fear without sound, and he saw the slightest brim of tears still clutching to her light colored lashes.

"Only if for now that you need me."

She gave him a quizzical look, "So yes?"

"Yes." He answered more plainly, and with a hint of impatience. She all but smiled with glee as she crawled back onto her pink pastel bed, pulling his hand with her as she went. He sat up against the headboard, waiting for her to settle, but Joan was clever as she was a nuisance, and she sat on his legs, crawling into him as his eyes grew dimmer and dimmer still, his body flooding with aggression. He wanted to growl and hiss and thrash around, but as she settled her small head into his chest, she made a sigh of content, and he was forced to let her have her way, if only for the moment. He kept his hands pinned at his sides, not nearly educated enough in how to keep a child calm during their fears. What had his mother done when he had been afraid? Being a proud child, he had kept his emotions bottled inside, rarely showing his flaws and what he considered to be weaknesses. She had held him like this only once, when he had been around for when his father had first entered Odin Sleep, and he had been too young to understand the meaning behind it. He had wept at his bedside, while she caressed him with perpetual adoration. That was a parent's love.

The night hours were ticking by slowly as he continued to search his thoughts. Joan's hair was soft and frizzy, tickling his nosed when she'd inch up higher to lean on him. He kept his hands as they were though, knowing he would never be comfortable with providing the reassurance a child longed for. She was too perfect for him too hold. The storm's erratic behavior had ceased, and only a languid rain knocked from the outside. When he was sure she was good and tired, he made to move her away, so he may stand to leave. Just as soon as he had placed his hands under her armpits, her eyes flashed open, and she looked at him with a small scowl, "You promised you'd stay." She whined.

"Joan, I said I would stay until you no longer needed me, and our time has expired. You will be fine now." He replied stiffly.

"But I want you to stay forever." She stood up with her short height, while wrapping her small arms around his neck. She was playing with the ends of his hair, trying to sooth him when she was the one in distress, "You are real right now, but tomorrow you won't be." Her warm breath hit his ear as she hugged him tight.

"Joan, enough!" He ordered, and he shoved her back lightly. He expected tears then, but she frowned with betrayal.

"I don't have a friend like you. I don't have any friends at all. If you leave, I will be alone again."

He rubbed the bridge of his nose, knowing he would be more sympathetic had he been younger in years himself, "Child, you cannot follow me home."

"Why not?" It was barely audible and she sat down in front of him, his stature being far too large for her bed as they took up the rest of the space.

"Your place is here. What of your Mother and Father, do they not warrant your love?"

"Couldn't they come too?" She knew the answer, but a child's mouth was never filtered and she asked anyways.

"I am not abandoning you… I'll be just beyond your reach, a call away in the sky."

"Will you come back again?" She was starting into small cries now that shook her petite body with choked sobs, "Promise…say you will come back!" She pleaded.

"I promise." She seemed to venture into herself after that, and he had to put a small sleeping charm over her, to finally have her eyes close. He had watched her sleep, even as the sun started to crown over the horizon. Her cheeks were flushed red like a porcelain doll, and her mouth was opened slightly as she giggled incoherently in her dreams. He had left her then, returning to more pressing matters that called him back with great importance. He had promised he would return when she asked, but it had turned out to be a broken promise on his part. When she had called his name, he chose to ignore, as a higher purpose had corrupted him, blackening his heart to ever care for the one called Joan.

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**And this is the new beginning! Time jump ahead, in which Joan is an adult for next chapter. Every childhood interaction between her and Loki will be seen or reflected in flashbacks and dreams now, because I want to have a connection that keeps building in a single line, without dwindling on her being an adolescent for too long. This is now my second focus, and those who followed this story before, knew I had two going at once, yet I remained faithful on updating both, so no worries. I promised that I would still keep many of the plot details the same, and I am not like Loki, I hold true on my word! Reviews yeah!**


	3. Chapter 3

**DanAlaya****:**** Well, where to begin! I pretty much owe you all the credit for getting me back to this stage, and I was so happy to see that this has come to a great start! Writing for child Joan is a new challenge and I think her interactions with Loki as an adult will lead to a richer relationship. Everyone is back in the habit of calling them LOAN, though I agree, it's weird at the start because she's an *ahem* child. This chapter is topsy-turvy again and now all of the childhood memories will be shown in flashbacks, because obviously people can't wait for LOAN! Thank you and I hope you enjoy!**

**DevilToBeLoved****:**** Yes, this is my third attempt, but I think I have something original here, so let's hope it sticks! Thank you for the feedback, and I hope you continue to enjoy!**

**JobanaBallack****:**** Yes, never fear, I have returned yet again for LOAN! Two chapters at once is never my thing, but I wanted people to get a fell to the point that I had even put LOLIOS on hold to get this started! I managed to update that one though too, so I must be wonder woman! Starting Joan as a child seemed like a smart thing to me so that they had a relationship that was real, and it starts as friendship, not with Loki being volatile and obsessive. I had to imagine him in a situation with a child, so hopefully that came out OK. I was never to write in a child's perspective too, so I hope I conveyed Joan as an innocent well. Glad it feels like something new again, and I hope everyone continues to enjoy this new start all over again!**

**Azura Soul Reaver****:**** Glad to hear it, I really wanted an original plot line and I think I struck gold! Thanks for reading and reviewing for both series, it gives me hope that I'm doing something right!**

**Megsy0****:**** Hehe, I thought a child mixed with an adult Loki would be something so unpredictable for him to deal with, and I am glad it's an adorable connection they've struck. Even when Joan is an adult, I will still be flashing back to her times as a child, so more of that cuteness is still on the way. I'm pushing boundaries with this story, so let's hope it pays off!**

**Seavanillas:**** Glad you are content with this new relationship of theirs. Oh I am so glad you asked that question, and yes as added drama, Loki is still going to have his wife and strange children that had been mentioned in the last one. This is still Stealing Me Softly, just with a new added spin!**

**JanFL****:**** Glad to have you back once again, and I apologize you found the other story so late that you had to start with this one again. Though in a way it's good, because now you are with me from the start, and I think you'll like what is to come yet! **

**arb97****:**** Oh a double reviewer, thank you for giving me feedback for both! You've been with me for quite a long time now, so I think you will notice some familiar things as well as the new changes, and I am glad you like everything so far!**

**LOKI IS KING****:**** Yes, child Joan and Loki interacting with her was quite a fun time. I will never go back to a movie plot, not even the Thor one, this is going to be original just like last time! I think things will work out much better for LOAN, but I can't tell you too much yet!**

**ferretfood****:**** Welcome and thank you. It's going to be quite a bumpy ride with many twists and turns, so I hope you enjoy!**

**Fat Old Sun****:**** Haha, I had to start with answering your second sentence just because it gave me a chuckle! Silly Loki, he has the worst karma of all, and I will delve into that with flashbacks about how their relationship changed. I didn't want to keep her as a child forever, but I will return to those moments just because they are so sweet!**

**LookAliveSunshine03****: Gosh, I am always amazed at how you will review every chapter that I have down so far, and I thank you for it! Yes, that is what I didn't like about Joan before, she had no backstory! I make a bad habit comparing her to Halios, but Joan was so far off the mark that it wasn't even fair. Starting out as a child has already changed so much about what we didn't know of her previously, and also it was fun to make Loki interact with a child, pushing his comfort zone beyond its limits! Hopefully the readers will feel more for Joan this time around, so here I go again! I will try to get those cute moments to ensue every time there is a childhood flashback!**

**Shakaku-lightningstrike****:**** The best review, nice and short but it spoke a thousand words to me! All I needed to know was that I did something right!**

**morbidly-funny****:**** Hehe yes a very cute start unlike last time, though this story is going to through people through some big holes with how emotionally different their relationship will be as adults as compared to when she was a child. We see grown up Joan here, and I think I struck some similar cords as I did the last time I typed this story. **

**Lina Mistress of Elements****: Welcome and thanks for the R&R. I don't know if this is your first time with this story, because I've already re-written it three times. If this is your first time, then I welcome you and I hope you enjoy what us to come next!**

**Disclaimer: For what seems like the thousandth time, I own nothing but my OC**

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"I do not believe I am capable of doing what you ask director." Joan said with a small frown. Her light brown hair was curling under her chin and dusted over her tan shoulders like wheat crops on the land.

Nick fury was all fire and brimstone when his one ruddy eye narrowed, "I am not asking, I am suggesting you do, and you'd best get going soon Miss Delacroix. This is the final task you need to complete in order to be a full-fledged SHIELD agent. "

"You want me to baby sit Stark, I'd hardly call that a task." She said while her hand rested on her hip perhaps a little too firmly.

"May I remind you that Agent Romanoff was presented this very same task two years ago, and she agreed with much velocity!?" There he went again, comparing her to another one of his priced Agent's. Whether he did this to purposely upset her had yet to be realized, but her mood always grew dimmer from such an untactful remark. She only nodded solemnly to end the discussion. The rest of her day had been spent packing, before she was ushered into a very conspicuous looking black car. To her, it added insult to injury for SHIELD to be so blatant about their identity. They got tossed many a look when driving about in such a vehicle, but no Agent seemed to care, and that bothered her more. She loved to hate her job, because she knew she would be stuck in it for a good portion of her life. Better to settle and enjoy what she could, seeing as no other option had looked nearly as appealing to her.

Her hazel eyes watched through the tinted window of the car as they sat in Monday morning traffic. She had been feeling a familiar stirring in both her heart and her mind, but time was lost by her and she could not dwindle on what was forgotten. At times she tried to recall many things when she had been an adolescent, especially at the present. She'd been having off dreams of a face hidden and cloaked in shadow. Why these memories chose to resurface now she was uncertain, but the inopportune timing had displeased her if nothing else. She looked at her hands absentmindedly, while entertaining the notion that they could cause more harm than good.

"We've arrived Joan." Agent Quartermain announced at the front of the vehicle. He was older than her in years, and was an Agent with much more experience to offer. He showed her the ropes every now and again which Joan had been thankful for at any rate.

She turned her attention back outside to the threatening sky scraper looming over her to the point that she could not see the top. She craned her neck as she stepped out of the car, thinking that it took great narcissism to display such a vast amount of wealth. From Stark's profile, and everything she had learnt from Clint and Natasha, Anthony Stark was exactly so when he needed to be. Underneath his rugged and charming exterior laid a man with the power to do unspeakable good. It remained to be unspeakable because he didn't like to sully his reputation with people thinking the better of him.

Quartermain handed her over both pieces of her luggage, which were filled with clothing and small essentials she would be in need of for her indefinite stay. She cleared her throat and nodded once to shake out her nerves as she started to go to the door. Quartermain and the other agent backed into the car, before pulling away into the flow of traffic. Stark's assistant already knew that her presence would be gracing them, and it showed maturity for her to come alone without other Agent's breathing down her neck. She stepped into the main lobby, and was surprised that there was no counter with a woman placed neatly behind it. Only an elevator was at the far wall, and her riding boots clipped along the polished floor in dull thuds as she pressed her finger to the button.

"_Please state your name and appointment time."_ Called a pompous voice which she had been expecting. Jarvis, the famous AI system was a non-living creature that perhaps helped Stark almost as much as Pepper Potts.

"Joan Delacroix. Ms. Pott's is expecting me, I'm with SHIELD." She waited, while gazing around, unsure of where to be looking before the doors pulled apart.

"_Welcome to Avenger Tower Ms. Delacroix. I hope you enjoy your stay."_ She almost complimented his mannerisms, but thought it bizarre to do so when he was only a machine. The door's snapped behind her, and she dropped both of her suitcases to the side in exhaustion. The tower was tall so she hoped the ride up would be long as she started to ponder what awaited her on the other side of these doors. She had been with SHIELD during the war, but had been doing a desk job, with pushing papers and making files on suspecting people whom SHIELD kept a watchful eye over. Everything she had heard of about those fateful months in New York a past year ago had been only rumors and gossip in the halls. Of course, she would go picking through a mind or two in secret to see what she could discover. She was less guilt ridden if the person she decided to invade was not known to her. Clint and Natasha had already asked her to never commit such an act on them, and she had stuck to that truce with ease. The Director also refused to be tested on by her mutation, not that she would have thought to do so anyhow, the thought had been erased from her mind the moment she had laid her eyes on his intimidating physique.

She'd advanced a long way in her telepathic abilities. The telekinesis was a spot weak, but she made up for that in control. Closing her mind off to intruders was the first lesson she had been taught at Xavier's School. Her time there had been short since SHIELD had spoken of interest in her, but in the short years before they had come to collect her, she had been given specific instructions for her skill set. She never let her guard down. The moment she had closed her mind to all others, she'd never let it down again, even for _him_.

The doors pulled apart after a lengthy ride, and she hiked her luggage under her armpits as she strode out with reserved nervousness. The posh penthouse was cold and quiet; she glanced around finding no one waiting to greet her for her stay. "Hello?" She called. There was no echo seeing as the place was made of glass, giving her a fabulous view to the woven streets below.

"Hello." A voice repeated in return. Her body made no flinch thanks to her SHIELD training. The element of surprise was something she was taught to fend against, but she could pick up brainwaves before they entered a room anyhow.

"Mr. Stark, I'm surprised to find you here." She said casually while turning around on the heel of her boot.

"Good God they sent a teenager. You aren't replacing Phil Coulson are you?" He said judgingly, "I guess they really do start you young there."

"I'm not a teenager, and no I have no authority or power to be replacing someone like Agent Coulson." She sat her luggage down, parking her rear on one of them as she watched Stark saunter around her, "Where is Ms. Potts, I was told to meet with her here at one-thirty sharp."

"You people are so by the book. Pepper's running late, so I volunteered to welcome you, after all, you'll be staying at _my _house." He put emphasis on the word 'my', and she wondered if she was not so welcome here as she was told. "So, how long are you staying?"

"The Director did not tell me as such. I can't think for too long."

He snorted unflatteringly, "Right, Fury hasn't told you. Not even an Agent yet and he's starting in on the secrets with you." He shook his head, though not sounding surprised, "You should get used to him hiding things he's very skilled at that."

"I'll keep that in mind." She brushed aside idly while studying his confident gait, "I'm not sure if Ms. Potts told you the reason for my stay?"

"Call her Pepper, it's weird hearing Ms. Potts. I don't even call her that." He paused, looking like he forgot her other question until she repeated it, "Oh yes, and no, I don't know why you're here, though I have a hunch that it has something to do with Fury keeping tabs on me."

"You're right and wrong. I need this assignment to help me advance to Agent status. Fury also thinks I may be of some value to you."

He raised a doubtful brow, "Look kid, I'm more than willing to help out with your work, but I don't think you can help me, unless you like to cook and clean?" He smirked, flashing his white teeth. He looked at her with superiority, giving no indication that she would be of help to him at all. Joan was used to this treatment before though, when Fury had first brought her to SHIELD. Barton and Romanoff had gazed at her like she was scum to be wiped away off their shoes; that was of course until she had told them what they had been thinking. The one and only time she had ever filtered through their thoughts. After that she had been treated with a shred of respect.

"I do like to cook." She teased, "But I can do more than that, if you'd give me the chance."

"Umm, I'm still not convinced. A demonstration might do it." He waved his hand in the air, conducting her to do something.

She rolled her eyes discreetly, while breaching the walls to his mind. It wasn't difficult, he was very open about whom he was, and she found herself sifting through his thoughts like a flowing river,_ "Not a teenager? She barely looks eighteen. What the hell is Fury thinking, knocking down the door to my house, and sending in a spy?! I shouldn't have argued with Pepper, I should have just let her make the introductions."_

"I'm twenty-five as I hear you are dying to learn." She gave him a flat look, and he blinked for a moment, wondering what had just occurred.

"Did I say that out loud?" He paused, looking perplexed as if she had just bewitched him with darks words like a warlock.

"No, I read your thoughts. I'm no spy as I said; I'm only here to help you, though if you had regrets, you should have sent Pepper."

"Don't ah…don't do that again." He said, involuntarily twitching as if something unpleasant had crawled up his back, "Are you a mutant?"

She grew a shrewd look, hating every time this conversation happened to arise, "Yes, so I see you've read the papers."

"Oh not really, I'm not one for tabloids unless I'm in them. Rumors have sparked about this…mutant problem though." He fingers drummed on his stubble chin, trying to make sense of an otherwise ordinary situation to someone such as him.

"There's no mutant problem!" She snapped, momentarily losing her focus while Stark gained a rather serious look. "Sorry about that." She said softly.

"No no, I've lived with people who have far worse anger problems." He smirked again, and she found a silly expression to suit him better than that of a focused one.

"Oh I've heard, or rather, I've read about him. After pushing around so many files, I tended to read some of the more interesting ones."

"What did mine say?" He asked with genuine interest to hear about himself, "I didn't like the latest entry I had seen last time."

"All thanks to Natasha I'm sure, but last I checked, it said you were a silent hero. It was entered by Fury, after you saved Manhattan from the bomb a year ago."

"Silent hero?" He said under his breath, "I don't like that, it has no cachet."

She shrugged, "Well, that's all it said."

He huffed, while searching for what she presumed, was something to drink, "Since I've discovered you're not a minor, can I offer you anything?"

"I'll pass." She said while going to seat herself by the bar with him, "A favorite pass time of yours?"

"That and the other thing." He said while waggling his brow.

"Amazing. You are exactly how Natasha said you were." It was true, Romanoff had spoken with guile when describing this man, but Joan could not help but think he would be far worse if he had attitude. Tony was open about his perfection and flaws, and that was just about the rarest thing to find in a person. Joan could grow to tolerate him, even be friends if the right timing ever struck.

"Oh Agent Romanoff, she's such a liar. It was her stalling to put the scepter through until I fell back to Earth, she'd deny it though."

"Yeah, I heard the story from her, though she tells it differently. Denial indeed." Joan laughed and Stark watched her with a raised brow.

"Where were you during the war? Still pushing papers I assume."

"Pretty much. I used to listen to all the other Agents though, and live it vicariously through them."

"When you say listen, do you mean _listen_?" He gave her a knowing look and she nodded unashamed, "Well I suppose I would have done the same thing. You missed out on some fun. Right in my floor there, the villain himself was smashed through the marble by Hulk." He pointed to a particular part of the floor, and Joan felt the smile on her face seep away. He had been here, a few meters away to where she stood now. She had never second guessed it, not once. The war criminal Loki that had been so set on ruling the Earth had once been a friend to a small mortal girl. Here she gazed, wondering what the years had changed him into, or if her naivety had really blinded her to the evil that had always lurked beneath. It was too impossible for her to dispute, that the Loki of the present and the one she knew from the past had been too different people. The name Loki wasn't exactly common, and from the descriptions she had heard, she knew it was that strange man who had intruded into her childhood bedroom when she was just the mere years of eight. A magical being would have been capable of telepathy light-years away, but she still had the very same question that surfaced on her mind. Why had it been him that she had reached out to? There are many mutants with the same telepathy as hers as she had found out, and they were only miles apart on the planet. What fates had made her call out to the one God so mischievous?

"I bet that was expensive to replace." She said after a pregnant pause. Tony was looking at her with curiosity, "Do you have a room where I can place my things?"

"Yeah, one floor down. It's the third bedroom on the left." She stood up, convinced that Stark had been oblivious to her bizarre behavior, but she had underestimated his skills that had come from some odd twenty years in corporate business. This girl was carrying a secret, and Tony Stark made a pack with himself that he would find out what that piece of information was. He couldn't even begin to imagine just how heavy a secret it was. It was one she had tried to escape and had spent her whole life running from, but such things had a way of catching up to people, and for Joan, this piece of bad news was already on her doorstep.

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**This story has suddenly become so easy to write for! The idea is fresh, and I actually like writing this plot this time around! I think I will take things slow, not only getting to know Joan, but everyone else as well. A longer story makes for some fun twists and turns to come, and of course, as I have been reminded from before, I promised lemons for LOAN, and I will make good on that promise this time! Yes I did jump ahead in time, but half the fun will be her and Loki filling in the dull grey blanks of the years that happened between the then and now. Next chapter will continue with Joan's new assignment, and Loki's POV shall also be introduced (I wonder how the years have been to him?!)** **Reviews yeah!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Lina Mistress of Elements****:**** One of your questions has been answered, we find out where Loki is this chapter. No reunion yet I'm afraid, but stayed tuned for that to come!**

**LOKI IS KING****:**** Hehe, no one wants to babysit Stark if they can help it. Joan can handle anything he can dish out if she could put up with Loki. I look forward to getting to write for everyone as well, and as far as Loki and the Avengers goes, well, it won't be like how it is for Halios' series. **

**JobanaBallack****:**** Yes, I definitely wanted to have her age abruptly just so I have the chance to keep going back to explore their relationship. What better way than in flashbacks?! I liked little Joan too so don't worry, she'll be returning yet again because it's just too fun having Loki interacting with a child! Loki's POV comes into this chapter, and I think it will answer many questions, at least for now!**

**Guest:**** Oh I look forward to getting to that part to, it may be hard for him to handle!**

**DoctorLokiLove****:**** Glad the stretch to X-men paid off, and I tried to have that connection last time but it didn't really work all that well. I'm not sure on which direction I will go with the rest of Marvel yet. I know there are other superheroes who are Avengers but most of this audience may be unfamiliar with such a wide spread group, and I might have to stick with movie verse with the exception of some characters. Hehe, I can't tell you about any villainous schemes yet, but stay tuned for when the action picks up!**

**DanAlaya****:**** Yes, what not get the hardest challenge that is Stark completed first?! I hate to love writing for him because I never know if it's exactly what he would say. No complaints yet so I must be doing OK! I thought I'd change Joan up, to the point that she's not even a SHIELD agent yet. It sometimes seems too simple that they just let everyone in, because it's a super organization and it's not like going for a regular job interview. Lots of people seem to like the X-men connection, and it explains more on what Joan actually is this time around. I'm glad she is determined, though I hope to make her a bit stronger as time goes on. When she meets Loki again, that will be the real test to see if I can make her a true female lead like someone else I created (not saying her name!) Stay tuned!**

**morbidly-funny****:**** Yes, no longer will I follow movie plots, and there is so much more to explore with Loki if I start after the war. Glad to know everyone is loving that she is a mutant, I never really explained that well before, but now we know!**

**LookAliveSunshine03****:**** Woo Hoo, glad everyone has so kindly taken to the X-men additive! Crossing over was a fun new thing for me, and I think it gives Joan more story now! Their interaction was fun to write, and I think I did Tony some justice enough to be passable. The time stretched worked, and now I am free to flashbacks when I feel they are needed. Indeed, we all need a little Loki, so here we go!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC**

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Freedom supposedly was a steep price to pay, yet Loki had gotten off as a free man. It wasn't so much as him being granted freedom, more like he had been turned loose unexpectedly upon the world. In his solitude, he had waited silently scheming as usual until an undetermined source would come to him, setting him free. The All fathers first mistake had been setting him in prison in the realm of the Dwarves. He had said Asgard could no longer stand his presence, not even enough to keep him jailed away, so it had been off to Svartalfheim to be watched over by the Duergar. He was forced to stay in a dank and cold cell in the realm below of Nidavellir. It was terrible, for most of the other prisoners were other Dwarves, and they lacked greatly in decent conversation. Most had been there on account of their thievery for finer treasures and elegant goods. What had Odin been thinking, placing him with these lesser fools? His words alone were enough to bargain his way out, and it took little convincing on his part. Dwarves desired capitol over anything else, and a bribe is what he fixed for the portly fellow with the rust colored beard whom brought him meals every other day. Loki had never bothered to learn his name; it was his actions that he was more invested in. Of course, being in prison he had no real treasured values to give, thus leaving him to conjure up one in his mind to be given as a bribe. It had been a difficult task, getting the guard to agree to a deal in which he would set Loki free in exchange for a golden lute which would be delivered to him as soon as Loki was able. It had been a lie, one conceived in months with careful planning, while he only ever prodded the guard with this request once every two moons. He would be patient, keeping track by the chink in the roof of his cell to when the silver light seeped through. Little by little, the dwarf began to wane, and his beetle black eyes would glow alight with avarice when Loki would describe in detail, such a treasure he would bestow to him. The trickster would not be the Duergar's problem once he escaped their tunnels, something to which the guard inevitably agreed upon, swaying his decision in Loki's favor. It had been another restless night for Loki as he lay on his cot, when he heard a key being entered into the lock of his door. The wrought hinges swung open, and the round fellow -barely reaching Loki's waist- took a tentative step forward, beckoning the God to follow. Loki tried to conceal a smile as he followed the stout man out, passing by the barred doors of the other inmates. He followed by torch light until they came to the end of a tunnel, turning up into stairs.

"This way leads you out into Svartalfheim. I am sorry I have no provisions to give you, but the weather is cold in fair warning." His politeness only lasted as long as he was reassured his payment and Loki smiled dolefully to ease any mistrust that still lingered.

After promising once more that the revered treasure would be sent his way, Loki was turned a free man, into the cold night. The Dark Elves ruled the topside of this realm, and they were as cold and sadistic as the soil Loki treaded upon. They were really no bother to him though, since he knew well enough on how to deal with them. They never stopped a traveler in their land unless they had settled for too long, but Loki was set on moving fast to leave the grey evergreen forest. If he had been stopped, he knew wide-eyed admiration would get him very little though it was no cause for concern since Loki never spared such treatment to any form of life, even those who were deserving of it. He stumbled passed large trunks and tangled roots that looked like fingers crawling into the dirt. Most of the ground was covered in a layer of shrouded mist, and the rocks were covered in lichen like furry green creatures. His spruce eyes had found him a way to the border of the woods, and he crossed out of the trees with much relief, after a battle against nature. He was battered with clawed scratches from the branches, and his already ill-stricken appearance from prison was worse for wear. Loki remembered it being one of the best night sleeps he had ever found, even though it was on the frozen flooring of Svartalfheim.

Presently, he was back on Midgard with a fresh new face, and clean attire to which he blended in superbly. By funny chance, it was the only viable realm left open to him now, and he would have to remain there until his planning was finished. The trouble was he had no plan. What was the next step? He had never thought so advanced in the future, for he believed his plan to have been foolproof at the time. A quite grand miscalculation as it turned out, but he'd have to make do. He had already accommodated a place to rest with magically counterfeit money. Midgard's currency was a curious thing, and he had found out quickly that there was no surviving a normal life without it. He refused to stoop so low as to work a mortal job, and instead sought to recreate the money a quicker way. He had very few purchase anyhow, and he was able to make do with the bare minimum.

He was currently sitting in his studio apartment, lounging on his bed while he thumbed through a paper of their current events. The lilac color of his duvet was odious, but provided warmth and his fingers clenched the fabric absentmindedly in agitation. The ink on the pages was escaping his unfocused mind. He was put off by a perturbed feeling that had been plaguing him in his dreams. It was that human child whom had abandoned him so very long ago. He had lost track of Midgard's years after being on Asgard and then in Svartalfheim, but as he was familiarized with the date, he calculated her to be twenty-five or twenty-six, depending on when her date of birth landed. It seemed a small number, but as he had watched the women of this age, he knew her to be full grown and mature, perhaps ready for a courtship. It was difficult to fathom as he always referred to her in his mind as the child whom was afraid of thunderstorms. He knew not of how she looked now, or where she had disappeared to. Gone without a trace is how he remembered it, and the feeling of a piece of himself being torn away had never left him. It had been an ordinary night on Asgard in which he was following Sigyn around, convincing her not to go through with her marriage as per usual. A cold dull thud had hit his chest and his heart had nearly stopped as he fell to the ground unexpectedly. Sigyn had cried out something he couldn't make through his fogged hearing, and his eyes had fluttered close after that.

When he awoke again, it was in the healing ward, with Thor standing at his side. At first it was silence, and he felt frantic when he first tried to pull back the familiar feeling that had left him so suddenly. Joan was gone, like a breeze through his hair and he could not trace her mind. He wouldn't speak for days, as he had pent up all his powers in dedication to finding his innocent little friend. Every visitor whom passed his way looked increasingly dejected, but it annoyed him most when Sigyn would lay her hand upon his, breaking his concentration. He would flinch away, and she would flee with a hurt look to which he would have normally been bothered by, but under the circumstance he just couldn't bring himself to care. It had been neglect that had drove Joan away, he was certain of it. Whenever she would reach out to him, he could barely bring himself to utter three words, before he would push her away, attending to other matters, such as Sigyn or the throne of Asgard. She had asked him time and again to come visit just once more, but he had never fulfilled that promise. He never heard the pain in her voice, her obvious cries for help and now they were so prominent in his mind that his eyes were close to bleeding, but it was too late. He left the healing ward, a wounded man with a missing limb, and he had to carry on as best he could. He never told anyone of her, so the burden was his to suffer alone.

When he was waging war on Midgard, he had not thought about her once, but this time around she felt nearer. Strange as it was, he had been able to forget her after many Asgardian years, so why suddenly was he thinking back to such an irrelevant part of his life? He knew it was for the very reason that it was not as irrelevant as he had made it out to seem. Often times Joan was the one he confided in, even if she was too small to understand the gravity of his issues. Just the privilege of being able to vent freely without worry of another listening in had been an immense relief. Thor often felt he could to talk to no one, and Loki had remembered feeling superior that he at least had this one problem covered. Sigyn had replaced her though, and soon the child would have felt that she was being brushed aside. Loki knew the feeling too when he was an adolescent, so there was no reason that Joan had not felt the very same hurt. He wondered if she had watched him as he had threatened war over her kind. But then, he always assumed that there was the chance that she was no longer living. No trace of her could be found, and she had vanished so abruptly that he wondered if it was her life-force he had felt fade away. When he had been released from the healing ward, he had traveled down here to Midgard to her old house, but it was not the same family in its bowels. He had never known her surname, and she had been a lost cause to him since that time.

A crack of thunder shattered his focus, and he looked out at the grey sky of New York. Rain began to fall between the rows of buildings, staining his window in a blur. He had a brief thought to wonder if the lightening still bothered her, or if had been a faze she grew out of, just like she had outgrown him.

ooOOoo

Joan scowled as she watched the weather from her bedroom in Stark tower. Not that she had many plans, but rain meant she would be trapped indoors with Stark all day. Pepper was usually busy balancing the weight of his company on her shoulders, and she would be out at work once again. Joan had only got to talk with her briefly the previous night as the three of them sat down to dinner at the bar. Takeout pizza had been shared between the three of them, and Joan had thought of it as very normal, more than she had been anticipating from Stark anyways.

"_Ms. Delacroix, I am sorry to interrupt you, but Mr. Stark is wondering how long you are going to ignore his presence by barricading yourself in this room." _Jarvis said suddenly. She had grown used to his voice sneaking up on her however, and no longer flinched when he interrupted her thoughts.

"Well, seeing as he sent you, it looks like I have no choice now, does it?" said Joan as she stood off the end of her bed.

"_No ma'am. Once he desires a conversation with you, it's best to get it over with."_

She huffed, though gained small comfort from the machines snarky attitude when it came to its creator, "Then I best get to it before he blasts down the door in his suit." She trumped to the door, going out into the hall while listening to Tony's thoughts to guide her to him. He was working on something clever with his armor in one of the lower floors to where she was walking now, and she got into the elevator, punching in the code that would take her down to him. He had been astonishingly very frivolous when giving her access to all of the Stark security codes, though she knew it was likely that he would change them if she abused the power.

The elevator stopped, and she stepped out into another hallway that led to his workshop, if that was an appropriate title for one who did everything with super advanced technology. She could hear the rain through the walls, and her heart sped up as a loud snap of thunder echoed through the steel and concrete walls. Unfortunately Stark had caught her moment of fear as she turned the corner and he grinned as if he had just tasted the sweetest thing.

"Afraid of thunderstorms huh ensign?" He griped.

She scowled at the Star Trek pet name he had given her. Seeing as she wasn't a full-fledged Agent yet, he had no idea what to call her until ensign had come to mind, "Not since I was eight. What did you call me down here for?"

"What, can't his boss get better acquainted with his employees?" He continued while giving a command to Jarvis.

"No because you aren't my boss." She sat down on a metal stool, kicking out her legs that were clothed in grey leggings the color of the sky outside. She wore a big, loose white sweater that did nothing to flatter her, but was cozy on a rainy day.

"How'd you know I was down here, or can I guess the answer?"

"If it bothers you, you can tell me to stop. I've never read a person's mind once they've told me not to. I will only break that promise should the need be dire."

"Nah, it's not as big of a pain as you might think; besides my thoughts are open." Joan watched curiously as he pulled up a design for his new Iron Man armor. It was hard to grasp that this narcissistic man was also a brilliant inventor, "I pretty much say what I'm thinking as you might have guessed." He grinned back at her.

"No, I hadn't picked up on that. I detected a more quiet and reserved man, who takes his accomplishments privately." The sarcasm dripping from her voice.

He scoffed, "Smart ass. I'm surprised that you haven't asked the most obvious of questions yet though, so maybe you are weird."

Her brows hit her hairline, "You figured I would ask 'where the other Avengers are', didn't you?"

He shrugged, "More to the point, I figured that's what Fury wanted to know. You seem like a girl who wouldn't swoon in the face of fame though. Or maybe I'm not the right superhero for you. Don't tell me you're a fan of Stars and Stripes."

"No, I don't like old men." She chuckled.

"Good, I was just starting to like you and I didn't feel like going back on a whim." He paused in her silence, "So are you going to answer my question on who's your favorite?"

"I'd rather not."

"It's Thor. All the ladies love his hair." He said with a headshake, "It might interest you to know that he's already got someone."

"I'm not interested in Thor." She growled, "And I am already aware of Jane Foster."

Tony stood, his mouth agape, "How do you know her name?"

"Because she is listed in his file, and she also has one of her own, mentioning how she and Thor were acquainted when he first landed here. SHIELD put her in hiding during the war because they feared she would be a target for the enemy."

"Said enemy has a name, or perhaps I should use the past tense 'had'. He might be dead by now if Asgard has strict law enforcement. I'm keeping my fingers crossed."

"You really think they'd kill one of their own?" She said, trying to keep her voice level calm, though failing miserably.

"Do I detect a trace of pity?" Tony said, fully turning around to gaze at her now, "And he's not one of their own from what I've been told. I haven't witnessed anything personally, but Thor said he's of some other giant race that went to war with their people."

"I was unaware of that. Don't give me that look; I'm not going to tell SHIELD." She said defensively when Tony gazed at her reproachfully.

"Good because I'd hate to throw you out on the street. Now, about this tone of pity." She had hoped he would have forgotten, but Stark as it turned out, was resilient, "You aren't the first SHIELD operative with a heart are you?"

"You can't pity someone you've never met." She answered flatly while leaping from the stool, "I'm going to eat something. Don't go anywhere without telling me, I'm supposed to look after you and it looks bad on my report."

"No promises there." He called over his shoulder as he turned back to his work.

She conjured up a convincing smile all the way until she reached the elevator. When the doors shut behind her, a frown was all that remained. His words had bothered her; not the accusation of pity or of distrust because she worked for SHIELD, but when he spoke of Loki being killed on Asgard. It seemed silly seeing as she hadn't conversed with him in over seventeen years, but her childish bond of friendship still held onto the hopes of him returning as he was that one night during the storm. Her instructor Charles Xavier would have chastised her for what she was about to do, but she turned away from that as she opened her mind. She searched for Loki in the same distance of where he always was on Asgard, and her mind nearly screamed in agony when the source reflected back in a much sharper connection. Her walls lifted back up as she sank to the floor of the lift, her heart racing and her face flushed. It might have been her imagination or a simple slip in her powers, but when she had felt out for her lost friend, he felt much closer than he ought to be. It had startled her through the very ride up to the top floor, and when the doors pulled apart, she could not bring her fragile bones to move for they were likely to shatter with the next bolt of lightning.

* * *

**Quite a long chapter considering I never pass over the 2500 word mark unless I'm doing a lemon chapter. This was a busy update, what with Loki's POV explaining more of what happened between them. Will he be more aware of her presence, now that she has made the mistake of reaching out to him? I really have no other words to say except that I hope you enjoyed. I'm apparently one of those people who forgot that 2012 ends supposedly on the 21****st****. If that's the case, I'd better get writing! Reviews yeah!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Mokou Attaev****:**** Welcome and thank you! Sorry this update took a little longer, but it's a lengthier one so much more to enjoy. You have an awesome display pic BTW!**

**LOKI IS KING****:**** Hehe, he wouldn't be Loki without all the tricks and schemes. Stupid dwarf should have known better, and I don't think any of them from LOTR would have fallen for it. More Joan and Tony interactions and man am I having fun with that! Looking forward to watching the movie again too!**

**LookAliveSunshine03****:**** Hehe, the degrading dwarf imprisonment was all of my own make, and I was glad you thought it clever! I promise to be getting Pepper in soon, though I have a few more chapters of Joan and Tony shenanigans XD**

**JobanaBallack****:**** Haha, oh you can bet that dwarf is gonna be pissed about that small truth yet! Yes, I delve more into Joan's connection with Xavier here, and I am having fun with the small X-men crossover there. Urgh, I gotta get LOAN to interact again, and I swear it will come shortly, I'm biting my nails in waiting too! Hehe, MOB Loki, I wonder how he would have done in the Sopranos or the Godfather?!**

**amber-was-here130****:**** Glad I tickled your curiosity bone (er- it's a real thing probably!) I hope you get more intrigued with every chapter :)**

**DanAlaya****:**** Yes, a better way for the link to be there I think! Man, I must be killing y'all with how much mystery there is behind their story this time, but that's what the flashbacks will be for! We get to see Loki's feels on Joan opening up her mind, and now he knows she still is moving about on Earth!**

**TearStainedAshes****:**** Yes, after a third time I really hope I can get it right, or I may just have to smack myself! The backstory was key, and I thought Loki interacting with a child would be something far out of his comfort zone. Post-Avengers, way to be! Having only to focus on Tony right now has made things a hell of a lot easier unlike last time where I was bombarded from the start to make connections with them and Joan, and what better Avenger to start with than Iron Man?! Oh gosh, I can't wait to get her and Loki to meet again, and I promise this story will be filled with lemon/angst moments like I always wanted it to be. More so than Halios' story because that is adventure, whereas this will be raw emotion and drama to the core! I SWEAR, I am going to make this heated and awesome, otherwise you have my permission to yell and scream at me XD**

**morbidly-funny****:**** I have been waiting to hear the words of my improvement! I notice so much change when I go back through my old stories, and I am happy with how it has come to this! Thank you for always being awesome!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC**

* * *

Joan repeatedly drummed her fingers on the counter of the bar as she stared at her phone, willing it to ring. She had been calling the Helicarrier frequently the past week, hoping to talk to Fury…or anyone willing to listen. She kept her paranoia silent, but neurosis was a hard thing to keep hidden, and it ate at her in the night when she was alone and it was able to catch up to her after an eventful day. Not that her life with Stark had become any more eventful, in fact, it was ordinary to the point that she almost wished for her desk job back, almost being the key word. Supposedly, Fury had asked her to observe Stark and to make sure he was in no danger, as well as to report in if any of the other Avengers made contact. Neither events had occurred, but it left Joan feeling like the college intern looking to replace Pepper Potts for early retirement. Pepper wasn't expected back for another week, which left Joan to cook or order in meals and take care of any request (within reason) from Tony. He entered the room as she was gazing at the screen of her phone, only acknowledging his entrance with a quick glance.

"Waiting for a call?" He hinted not so subtly, "Oh, is it a boy?! If it is, make sure you're home by eleven, and call if you're going to be late."

She gave a soft glare, "That's really cute."

He shrugged while pulling out a bottle of water. He looked grimy from work, and he didn't smell as pleasant as she was used to. It was a nice to know he still understood manual labor, even if it was for his own benefit, "Always wanted to try out the role of parent. What do you think?"

"I'll give it a solid b minus." She said while pursing her lips.

"Well, worth a shot. I'll have to do my homework I guess." Joan watched him in mild interest as her hand rested on her chin and her phone was in the other. She knew another question was coming without having to even read his mind. His face was reserved and his eyes weren't on her suddenly, "Speaking of your parents –do they know you work for SHIELD, or what's up with that?"

She couldn't help the sigh that escaped her. She wasn't fond of sharing her life story with others after having grown adapted to keeping it a hidden part of her, "My parents think I work for a travel agency in Oslo."

He gave her a blank stare, "How does that work, what if they call you?"

"Well, the Helicarrier has people who work in a telephone operation, redirecting lines for agents who have family members who are…less informed. I gave them a fake number that directs them to a SHIELD operative and they transfer the call to my cell phone."

"That seems like a lot of work for nothing. Don't your parents think it's strange that you never answer the phone right away?" He looked nonplussed and agitated.

"Not really. They only call me every few months. Do you know how expensive a call would be from Minnesota to Norway?"

He laughed suddenly while looking amused, "What about your mind reading, do they condemn that, or are they used to it after so many years."

"Hmm, it's hard to condemn something that they don't know about." She said in a whisper, looking impish while he openly blanched at her.

"They don't know you're a mutant?! I don't know whether to salute you or smack you for keeping a lie for so long. Is ensign Delacroix not as innocent as her file suggests?"

She smirked, "I wonder what you would do had you been in my position. If you've read the papers, you'd know majority aren't too fond of this mutant _problem_, and even less so when it comes to a member of ones' family. I went to school with children who have been disowned, they lost everything and had nowhere else to turn."

He gave her an approving look, "You went to that school up in Westchester County…what's its name again?"

"Xavier's school for gifted youngsters. I was fifteen when I left home. My parents were under the impression that they were sending me to a private school. Charles understood my situation that I didn't want my parents to know the truth, so he was very helpful when keeping me secret, until Fury came along of course."

Tony's brows rose to a high extent and his face was alight from not only the sheen of sweat, but from the look of excitement, "Doth my ears deceive me, are you actually going to tell me something about Nick Fury?"

"If you behave." She gazed at him knowingly and he only smiled in guilt, "Do you promise to behave, or am I going to have to walk out of this room right now?"

"You wouldn't get far. Jarvis, lock all doors exiting from this room and let no one override that command." Stark crossed his arms, looking proud with himself as she gave him a scathing look.

"Are you that desperate to hear about Fury, or do you like being in control?"

"If I wanted to talk to Fury, I could have him sipping from a small china cup in an English tea house." Joan's mouth turned up at the corners at the thought of the Director holding a small white cup on a tiny saucer, "Of course, this is my house and I like to have control, but if we can share a laugh at Nick's expense as well, I say why not?!"

"You did paint a rather nice picture of him drinking Earl Gray and for that you get to hear a story." Her mood had lifted, and for a moment she was able to put her phone down thanks to Stark's distraction.

"Am I to understand that I can't repeat this to anyone without Nick blowing a fuse?"

"Probably, he doesn't like people to know his SHIELD business, or the fact that he hires mutants such as myself. It was on a day like this that he had come to the school actually, with no real specific reason other than to find gifted youth who could prove useful in the future. Keep in mind that most mutants are runaways who have yet to support themselves. I think that is what attracted Fury to us in the first place. Most would be willing to do a job that is open minded with the way a person's mutation works, and to have unlimited access to use that power without fear of ridicule was appealing to many, myself included."

"Did he come asking for you?"

"Not at first. He was merely browsing, like a person casually would in the supermarket. He spoke with teachers and the headmaster of course, directing questions about what mutant would serve the needs he was looking for. Telepath's were of course most useful because we can get information at a higher rate than of normal means. Xavier's school was filled with telepath's though, and there was nothing particularly fascinating about me that set me apart from the others. When I was first interviewed by Fury personally, I could sense he wasn't impressed, and his thoughts coincided with that feeling."

"Jeez, you'd think he'd known to hide those thoughts with a telepath in the room. Then again, he's a brick head, and an in your face type of person so we shouldn't expect much."

Joan chuckled, "I agree. It wasn't exactly my ambition to be with SHIELD, but I saw it as an opportunity. I was nearing nineteen then, and even though I was an adult, I was just as frightened as the children who resided there, perhaps more. I knew the truths of the world and how cruel it was to people like me, I'd seen the papers and I had read the reforms the Government was so set on putting into action. With SHIELD…it was a way out where my identity could be hidden and I would no longer have to hide."

"So you'd be hiding in plain sight, sticking it to the man. I like that." Tony noted with appraisal.

Joan nodded somberly "I knew my chances were dim from Fury's dismal view of me. He was set on someone older, wiser and physically stronger. Charles begged him to reconsider though. I never knew what it was, but I had a much stronger bond with the headmaster than many of the students. It had nothing to do with my mutation for he treasured all powers alike, and I was no more gifted than any to have entered his doors. For whatever reason, it was he whom helped me get my life on track, and before I knew it, I was gifted with a note from Nick Fury five weeks later, telling me that he would gladly accept 'Ms. Joan Delacroix' into his ranks. It was with an odd feeling that I began to pack my belongings the next day. X-mansion had been my home for almost five years, and I would be leaving my sanctuary. My first thought had been my parents and what I was to tell them, but Fury had reassured me that it was under control. He was rather curt with me, and I could tell he had selected me with the utmost reluctance. I knew it was Xavier whom had helped me, and it made the goodbye less painful. I had grown used to so many goodbyes though, as people would come and go from the mansion. If they felt they were ready, it was their choice to leave, and my time had now come."

"Do you ever miss it now, I mean; working with SHIELD at a desk probably wasn't what you had in mind." Tony was more invested in the story, and he had parked himself into a chair, his water bottle now a quarter of the way filled.

"It certainly was a rude awakening, but I understood I was not ready for more strenuous tasks that SHIELD had to offer. If I was to ever read someone's mind, someone of whom they thought important, I was escorted with an agent, and they would usually do all the talking."

"So does everyone at SHIELD know there are mutants working in their midst, or is this another one of Fury's grand secrets. I think I can venture a guess."

"If you're leaning towards only some people knowing then you would be right. I've worked with two people you are also familiar with; Agent Romanoff and Agent Barton."

"Hmm, so you've only got a handful of people left on that Avengers checklist of yours." He grinned, still favoring the joke that she secretly was a fan of one of them, even if she wouldn't share who, "One questions though."

"Really, only one after all that?" said Joan incredulously, "And here I thought I would be flooded."

"Why Oslo, of all places? It seems a strange place to select since your last name is Delacroix. I'd have assumed France."

"Well, Delacroix is just a surname, but neither of my parents speaks French and most of my father's family have lived in America for generations. It was small chance that led me to say Oslo." She hesitated, suddenly feeling sheepish about her next question, "This is going to sound foolish, but did you ever have an imaginary friend when you were young?"

Surprising Stark didn't laugh, "I did, and when I grew up I turned him into a reality. His name is Jarvis."

Joan pulled a face, "We don't all have the resources you do, but I used to have a fake friend and I always imagined he was from Oslo. A weird connection to make, I know, but when you're a child you think up crazy things."

"Well, I could always make an AI system for you." Tony joked.

She forced a laugh, "No, no that's OK, I don't need him to be real." _'Since he already is.'_ She thought to herself silently.

"I need to get back to work, but we could go out later. You've only been in this building since you've arrived and that makes me a poor host."

"You want me to go out in New York with you?!" She exclaimed, "Will I live to see tomorrow?"

"Oh Joan." He scolded, "You'll have fun I promise, and if you say no, I'll insist that you do anyways. Change into something else beforehand, you look-" He didn't finish his sentence, he only shrugged at her clothes while scrutinizing.

She gave him an affronted look as he commanded Jarvis to unlock the doors. Internally she groaned, while trying to imagine what a night out on the town with Tony Stark would be like, and could only assume it would end in disaster. She chanced one last look at her phone, and found she had one missed called with an untraceable number. No doubt Fury would chastise her for missing him after badgering him with calls all week. Joan stood up from her seat, and decided that between the two choices, changing her outfit would be less tedious than a call to Nick Fury.

ooOOoo

Loki walked the streets of New York once more that week, and he found himself tracing back to parts he had already visited. His face was marred into a scowl of concentration, though his efforts were proving to be in vain. No matter how long and far he searched; he was unable to find Joan. She had eluded him once more, but there no was no room for doubt in his mind that it had been her who had reached out to him for the briefest of moments. It was so familiar and welcoming, yet he could not find a reason for her sudden break in willpower, or why she was so determined to keep him out again. It was an unsettling relief to learn she had not parted from this world though he was at a loss for words to say to her should he find her once more. It had been so long, and never had he been forced into a situation of being reunited with an old friend. He blamed that on the reason for never having many to confide in to begin with.

Joan was not his friend, and she never had been. She was a small confident who was merely an open journal for him to vent into. In fact, the more thoughts he had that were plagued with her, the more he found himself with strong emotions of hate. He was sick within himself to feeling loathing for a child, but he had to keep reminding himself that she was no longer an innocent. Perhaps she was already blessed with children of her own, and he wondered if they had inherited their mother's gifted mind abilities. Had he grown so useless from his imprisonment that he now had to succumb to thinking fantasies about his former secret he kept so well? He was ridden with remorse for himself at how low he had truly fallen. This must be the sole purpose why he was frantically searching for Joan; he had nothing else left to do. There was no time for war when he had no allies, and it was likely that he had more villains looking to serve his head on a silver plate. There was nothing else for him to gain, only the mission to find his little porcelain doll. Whether it was to find comfort in seeing her final result, or to finally have his long unanswered questions be rectified, he was uncertain, but he knew he had all the time in the world to find her.

He hoped his change in appearance would help remain unnoticed, and so far he was just another face in the crowd. His hair was shorter, but he kept his features the same and he always dressed in a higher status to feel important. The only looks that were cast his way were ones' of curiosity or wonder from women, and the occasional demonizing glare from the male populous. They need not waste their time, for he held no interest in the ordinary days of mortals. Their frailty was masked by their overwhelming desires for money, much to his utter boredom. He was able to keep SHIELD off his trail though, and that was the smallest victory he could have asked for. No one of Asgard had come searching yet either, which could mean two things, one being that they had not checked to see if he was in his cell, or the All Father was too weak to summon a porthole here. It would be Thor who would come searching; Loki didn't even have to overthink that. There was the small chance that he was already present on Midgard, visiting his human companion to which Loki could only raise a brow.

Currently, Loki was looking from afar at another one of Thor's mortal friends. Stark tower mocked him as it stood proudly in the sky, and the king whom resided there was too pompous and sure of himself to not comprehend the danger that lurked only blocks away. Loki had no real reason to harm Stark now, but he was ever watchful of the human, and was curious to know how he lived on a normal day. It was difficult to tell for the top floors were for living, and Loki dared not tread too closely without being caught first. He would watch the entrance to the building, but it seemed like not many people came or went too often, and most that did were other business officials. The daylight hours were burning away into an early autumn evening, and he walked down a path lined with trees as he saw Stark emerge from the entrance with a companion in tow. She looked uncertain to be with him, and Loki had to sympathize. Anyone who was forced to go out with Stark in public should be embarrassed. He opened the door of the car for her, though her expression was flat and she stumbled into the seat, looking flushed and annoyed. The silver automobile pulled away from the perimeter of the tower, and Loki watched as it merged into the traffic. He sighed, feeling aggravated with himself as he began to follow their direction by hailing one of those yellow public cars. He told the driver that he was friends with the pair of people, and to keep close on their tail. It only meant more money in this man's pocket, so he asked no questions as they trailed after Stark's flashy sports car. It seemed like once again, he had nothing better to do than to chase old ghosts from his past.

* * *

**So close, yet so far away. *Sighs*, I like to keep you all in waiting until they finally speak again, though the moment should be coming up shortly. I delved into Joan's history some more and I was finally able to talk more about her parents, something I had wanted to do in the first take, but it had never arisen. I think I'm growing impatient with the rest of you when wanting them to meet again, so I will keep this short and get back to writing! Reviews Yeah!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Megz0r****:**** Welcome, and thank you for the compliment! I try to use smart wording when I can, and I give thanks to dictionary dot com! Glad you love it all!**

**JJwolf****:**** Well, I am glad to have written a story that you hold in high esteem! It's only going to take off from here, so I hope you enjoy!**

**LOKI IS KING****: Hehe, Tony and Joan becoming friends! Urgh, I'm taking my sweet ass time with a LOAN reunion, though they are one step closer here!**

**JobanaBallack****:**** Yeah, the wait teases us more here, though I can feel them getting closer! Loki's thoughts are just crazy to toy with, and he's still a stalker, even in this new format! Writing a history for Joan felt right, and I will still go into it more with flashbacks of course. Hehe, what a bad girl not telling her parents! **

**LookAliveSunshine03****:**** Joan's past was great, and I don't know why, but I thought making Jarvis the imaginary friend from Tony's past would be fun. The wait is nearly over, and they are much closer here already!**

**DanAlaya****:**** Hehe, well I hope to add lots of kink to this story, and I so promised those lemons that I will be able to fulfill this time. This chapter gets busy, so squint at every line (well not really) but enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC**

* * *

Joan was growing flustered and agitated when Stark finally decided to raid her wardrobe. Apparently everything she owned was not well enough in his standards to step out in public with him, and after three unsuccessful outfit changes, he invaded her room, digging through her clothes, adamant on finding something that she had overlooked. He crawled in deep like a kid looking for Christmas presents while discarding anything that he considered to be unattractive.

"What was wrong with the last dress I tried on?!" She nearly screamed, her hands pulling through her now ruined hair.

"I don't want to even get into the reasons as to why plum isn't your color." He said over his shoulder, "God, where did you get this?" He tossed a pineapple shade dress, and she caught it with a heartfelt expression.

"Hey, my friend Aaron bought me that for a birthday!" She said while holding the dress up to her cheek, "Do you do this every time you take Pepper out?"

"I don't have to." He chided, and she scoffed, "Who's Aaron, or was he another student at mutant high?"

"Is nothing I've shared to you about my past sacred?"

"Only your dirt on Fury." He vanished deeper for a moment that she was tempted to shut the doors and lock him in. He re-emerged, looking triumphant, "Found one that would look presentable. Everyone looks good in black." He threw the dress at her and she caught it clumsily while letting the yellow one cascade to the floor to join the other abandoned clothes.

"I'm not even sure this will fit." Said Joan as she held the dress at arm's length, examining it with close detail.

"Well, rub castor oil on if you have to lube into it. We're on a time limit." He tapped the face of his watch before leaving through the open door.

Arguing with him would get her nowhere, so she sighed in defeat and slid into the dress. It was tight, particularly around her buttocks from her pear shaped build. It was a rather streamline design, fitting on the way down passed mid-thigh. The sleeves were small, sliding down her shoulders and exposing her collarbone from end to end. She threw on a grey leather jacket over top, making her less exposed than would have been comfortable. She was under orders after all, and dinner with Tony Stark never seemed innocent even when it was just dinner. Lastly she slipped on a pair of open toed heels that were sleek black though rather old. SHIELD didn't exactly pay a salary where its employees could afford to splurge. The only she could afford to do was work, and that's what was to be expected from a SHIELD agent (which she had yet to accomplish).

She hopped out from her door, grabbing her purse at the last second in which she carried her phone, and her weapon of choice. Her aim was terrible with a gun, so she chose a knife. It was an easy tool for her telekinesis to manipulate, and the damage could be much more excessive. She wasn't encouraged to kill anyhow, and it was likely with a gun that she would take a life by accident, or even her own foot. She met Stark out by the elevator, where he neither approved nor disapproved of her appearance.

"Your hair's a mess." He said at last, his eyes lingering on her messy locks.

"I was pulling it out when you wouldn't leave me alone." She deadpanned.

He was unaffected by this turn of events, and they entered into the lift in silence. Joan was biting the inside of her cheek, suddenly finding the situation to be very awkward. She had known Tony only a week inside his home, but going out into New York seemed like a stretch in their relationship. It was never wise to grow close to someone, especially if Fury expected her to hand him in for some sort of treason later. She was still reeling over the conversation she had got back to from headquarters. It was Barton whom she got to speak with and all he had said was to 'keep Stark close by', but she didn't know if he was in danger, or if Tony was the danger. Every time she tried to ask, she was brushed aside and it infuriated her more than anything. After six years with these people, she assumed they would have been more inviting, but perhaps that was her naivety shining through after living under X-mansion where someone's secret was everyone's secret.

They made it down to the lobby, and she followed Stark outside, surprised to find a car already waiting for them, "Jarvis kept it waiting." He answered to her astonished face. She suddenly felt daft, for it was always a safe assumption to put the blame on Jarvis for anything spectacular that happened.

She nodded without saying anything stupid, while reluctantly following him to the car, "How did you talk me into this?"

"Joan, we've been through this. I would have dragged you outside anyways, so you might as well have fun."

She fumbled into the car unexpectedly, though not from Stark's words. Her neck was prickling and her body was rocked with the sensation that someone had been watching them from a distance. She said nothing even as Stark got in and pulled them into traffic. Could she run the risk of opening her mind to listen to all the people in her near vicinity, in hopes of finding a possible trace of something that wasn't there? If anything, it was only her paranoia returning to settle in on her. Loki was away on Asgard, and she had to stop convincing herself otherwise.

If by some small chance he was present, it seemed unlikely that he would have the resources to find her. She had left him without a trace of anything to go on, and the gap in time in which they last spoke would have shook the way he saw her. He would most certainly be aware she was no longer a child, but there could be no occurrence in which he could label her out in a crowded room. What was she so afraid of anyways? Well, he had turned out to be a murdering lunatic from another realm, and it was highly implausible that he would be so thankful to see her again. _'Good for you Joan, answering a question yourself!", _she thought in resentment. There was the off chance that he had forgotten her entirely as well, and perhaps she was weighing too much on the line that he would be so desperate to converse with a mortal.

"You not talking makes for a very boring car ride." Tony said sourly.

Instead of answering with a reply, she decided to chirp back, "Has anything eloquent ever left your mouth?"

"Not in the last six months, unless you count the time I spit a mouthful of Macallan Lalique out from laughing. The bottle cost me ten thousand, so it doesn't get much more eloquent than that."

"You spent ten thousand dollars on a bottle of whiskey?!" She exclaimed, forgetting her composure for a moment, "God I hate SHIELD."

"What, they can't pay you _that_ bad."

"Trust me, it's laughable."

"Can you even afford to be seen laughing or is that taboo as well, because Natasha and Clint were such stiffs when I met them."

"Well, they take their jobs rather serious, but that's the way it works. I suppose I'll end up like that too, I don't laugh that often now as it is." Her eyes frequently shifted to outside the car, but there was only the motions of people walking to be seen.

"If your goal is to end up boring, I should warn you that I will be a thorn in your side. You won't be able to help but laugh if I can help it, and I am good at alleviating ones' stress, just ask Pepper."

"I don't doubt that." She said in surrender.

They arrived at a posh looking restaurant after a long and tedious car ride that was spent with bickering and making jabs at one another. Joan had mostly forgotten about the odd feeling of being watched, though she hadn't put it out of her mind either. They stepped out from the car and a blast of cool air hit her, blowing her wild waves about her face as she tried to see through her sappy locks. She followed Tony to the door, and was welcomed into a stuffy atmosphere that warmed her skin as soon as she passed the threshold of the door. The woman at the hostess podium looked flustered as they approached.

"Mr. Stark, a pleasant surprise." The manager spoke as he pushed passed the woman whose eyes had grown too big for her head after too much ogling, "Shall you be wanting the same table?" The man looked like a worm. His hair was receding badly, no matter how much he attempted at a come-over with brill cream. He had a pencil thin mustache that looked like dirt under his nose, and his skin was waxy while being cloaked in a black suit that he finished with a magenta tie around his fat neck.

"That should suit." Tony answered while signaling a nod at Joan. She scowled, having never entered such a pristine building in her whole life.

"Nancy, show Mr. Stark and his company to their table!" He seethed and the woman jumped in her skin as she began to lead them into the restaurant. Joan watched the door with longing, knowing now she would be trapped in here for the duration of a meal. They were put in a back booth by a window on the upper floor. She grimaced as Tony pulled her chair out for her, and she was certain he did it to purposely get a rise out of her for he smirked without shame.

"I don't think I am worthy enough to even breathe in here." She said while looking around the dim lounge lighting of the establishment. The walls were encased in iron grey, and the air smelt like spiced orient food.

"You'll enjoy yourself, swear to God." He said while raising his right hand which still held his napkin.

"People are staring at me."

"No, they're staring at me, while trying to figure out who the hell you are. They'll probably mistake you for Pepper…or the other thing."

Her face grew with audacity, "I don't want to be the other 'thing' do I?"

"Nope, because the other thing is usually what would be dumped on the curb the next morning. I guess I haven't made it clear that me and Pepper are exclusive."

"No, you failed poorly." She commented. Their waiter came back with a bottle of champagne, though he hovered long after their drinks were poured. Joan sent a scathing look at the man, while Tony merely raised a brow, "Something we can help you with?" Joan asked vehemently.

"I-I was just wondering if you were Pepper Potts." He simpered.

"No, I'm his bodyguard." Tony snickered behind his hand while the man looked astounded.

"Really, Iron Man needs a bodyguard?" Though his tone was more surprised because she was a small female.

"Well, I don't go around in the suit all the time." Tony continued while playing along.

"Indeed sir." The waiter said before bowing away back to the kitchen.

"Is this how it always is for you?" asked Joan, her nose scrunched.

"On slower days." He gibed, "I hope you like Thai food."

Joan's eyes scanned the menu, and she had to admit that she was not so culturally educated in food other than pizza and Americanized Italian cuisine. She let Tony order for her, while once again her eyes rested to outside the window, to where she thought there was someone waiting.

ooOOoo

Loki was not surprised when Stark's car came to a stop at an elegant restaurant. He hadn't partaken in any of Midgard's fine dining, though he trusted the billionaire to know where to go. He paid the expensive tab of his cab fare to the greedy driver with his magically counterfeit money and stepped out on the other side of the street where he watched Stark and his companion exit from the vehicle. The girl was not the same one whom Loki had seen with Stark when he had first arrived on Midgard last time. His assistance Potts had strawberry blonde hair, whereas this female had dark wheat colored hair. She was willowy and awkward in her shoes, and she seemed to shy away from the contact of society. This all came from a first glance of course, and it was hard to depict anything without knowing someone from their depths. Her attitude was friendly but reserved with Stark, so he eliminated the chances of them being anything but platonic. They disappeared behind the dark veil of the revolving door, and Loki kept his distance still, even when he made to cross the street. He spotted Stark dragging the girl away to a table, and she looked back at the door with such longing, that Loki felt she had seen straight through him. For a moment he forgot his purpose here, was it to spy on Stark, or to watch who he was with?

He thought of entering the building, but it was not common for one to eat alone on Earth, and he wasn't up to disguising himself either. The citizens may have forgotten his face after a year, but Stark surely would not have. The only likely option was to cloak himself unseen, and he waited for another to go through the door before following as an invisible image. Immediately after entering, his senses were clogged with a strong and prominent spice which nearly had his eyes watering. It took him a moment to gather his bearings to see that the eating hall was quite enormous. He could not spot Stark in the crowd at once, though he assumed he would be on the upper deck just because his ego was enough to put him there. He had to dodge by servers with trays and he almost ended up wearing someone else's meal once or twice. A large woman backed out from her chair unexpectedly and he was nudged in the side. With an enraged glare, he turned her food into grubs, a nice surprise that would await her when she returned. He found Stark at last, in a corner situated by a window. His face was always in a crooked, sarcastic expression though his companion looked wan from what he was saying.

"So, you never told me about Aaron."

"That's because I was hoping you'd forget." She said, looking dismal as she picked at her food, "You know, I would have settled for Burger King."

"I would have too, but I wanted to get you out of the house. I felt the question I have to ask is better for public."

"So more people can overhear it?" Loki had to admit that the girl was in over her head with Stark. The man was quick and sharp, and he used his snarky wit to get ahead in any situation.

"No, but since you are away from your job, I expect you can give me a more solid answer. What is SHIELD gaining from having you at my house, and are they under some danger that they need my help with?" His dark eyes grew pensive as he turned them on the girl. To her credit she did not waver in her seat.

"You ask difficult questions Mr. Stark."

"One's that I am hoping you can answer Ms. Delacroix."

She was a SHIELD agent, or at least a member for SHIELD. Funny, he did not expect something from one so young and inexperienced. She took time with her answer, though she made no movement in her seat, "You are in no foreseeable danger from what Barton said, and I am not here to incriminate you either. SHIELD is under the impression that another invasion could be likely. All from a new threat of course, seeing as you and your team wasted away with the Chitauri."

"And what provoked such a rise in them to think there is going to be an invasion. Do they have NASA patrolling the stars?" asked Stark less formally.

"This news comes from Asgard, your friend Thor. From what he told Fury, it would seem that Loki was aligned with another, one whom remains to be seen though is likely a cause for concern."

"And is Loki going to join with this mysterious threat, because I don't feel like throwing his ass back in prison after we just finished cleaning up his mess." Loki's eyes darkened, though a flicker of concern he also felt. Perhaps prison would have been a safer place, had he known the "other" was still lingering in the abyss of an expansion.

"I don't really have that much information. No one talks about Loki, he's old news to SHIELD." She spoke in such an idle tone, that it damaged his greatness with her slander.

"Well, I haven't heard from anyone else, we don't exactly tweet each other. Rodgers is slow with technology. You could help me of course."

"With what?" She looked at him with mistrust, "It works well enough for Fury and Maria having the Avengers, but the council was really pissed about the damage you all caused last time."

"Damage or enslavement, yeah that's really worth complaining about." Stark snorted, "I need you to get a message to Barton and Romanoff for me. With their help, I may be able to find Steve."

"But –if I do that, I am putting myself in a risky position. For one thing, I wasn't supposed to tell you any of this."

"Yes, but if we have more time to plan, than things might not end up as messy as they did last time. We aren't the best team when it comes to assembling if you hadn't noticed."

She smiled briefly, "What about Banner?"

"I already know where he is. Thor, well, he'll know when to come, and he already knows the situation." He gave her his most beseeching look that was laced with personal gain, "So, what do you say?"

"Tony Stark wants me to help rally the Avengers?!" She said vaguely, "I guess I can't refuse."

Stark grinned without mercy, "Great, now I can pay for this crappy food and we can go eat something real. Pepper's back at the tower and I already told her to order a pizza."

"You thought this food was so crappy! Why did you take me here then?"

"It's where I take every business associate. They usually hate the food, and by the end they'll agree to anything. I've had Thai food at half the price with twice the taste."

"Clever." She droned, "I'll wait for you outside. I might be able to make that phone call you requested."

She stood unbalanced on her shoes and nearly toppled onto an invisible Loki, who backed away with a sneer of contempt. He chose instead to follow her over Stark, after wanting to discover more of what she knew from SHIELD. She pivoted down the stairs, and into the main hall were a ruckus was forming around the table were the large woman was shrieking and throwing her doll hands up in the air. The manager was trying to calm her while her equally large husband was fuming behind his white collared shirt. Loki smirked at the insects crawling on her plate, while the SHIELD agent merely raised a brow to the scene.

She continued to the revolving door where he followed her out. The air had a nip, and he noticed her exposed legs reacted to the chill. He watched her face carefully as she fidgeted with a piece of technology in her hand. Her back rested against the ivory wall, her toffee hair brushing over her shoulders while her hazel eyes skimmed the screen. He was in a disconcerting proximity to her, standing only a shoulder away as her studied her actions. Her hand traveled through her windswept hair as she held the device to her ear, "Dammit." She swore under her breath.

"Hey Joan." Her head whipped back to Stark as he came through the door, but Loki trained his eyes hard on the female. She smiled forcibly at Iron Man as he came up to her, "Any luck with the call."

"No, but I'll try again at your place. Calling SHIELD isn't exactly like placing an order for Chinese take-out."

"Then let's go." Stark seemed put-out from her lack of assistance.

When she made to followed, Loki risked a chance at reaching for her hair between his fingers. The strand slipped through like velvet, but she did not mistake his touch for the icy wind. She paused, and turned around with a step back, her eyes looking before her where Loki remained unseen. She gazed with a cool expression, her brows furrowed and Loki felt a familiar pull at his mind. He kept his walls solid this time, for he was now aware that it had been her invasion he felt the first time. She gasped softly and her face relaxed as she turned away with hesitance.

"Joan, hurry up." Stark called from the car. Her eyes narrowed on Loki one last time unknowingly before she turned and walked away from him.

Loki waited until the car disappeared before he turned corporeal once more. He remembered worse times at feeling bewildered, though Joan's sudden reappearance was not what he had been expecting. Of course she was with SHIELD, any mortal with such a gift would never go unnoticed by them, though it was a hindrance to him. Suddenly they were two plains apart, and he would not be able to converse with her under normal standards. That hadn't been his original plan of course, and he might not have sought her out at all if it hadn't been for the grievance of her waltzing back into his life promptly. He thought over the detail of her being with SHIELD again, and it may well be a blessing in disguise if he was able to manipulate her. His very life was jeopardized now, and she may turn out to be one answer that could improve his chances greatly. His face grew a smile that was malicious and cruel as he began to work a scheme in his head. Joan would have to be his friend again, and she had no choice in the matter. He had found his porcelain doll at last, and he would draw her in like a moth to the flame, burning her slowly with adoration and ecstasy with the trap that held no escape.

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**Woo, long chapter that finally sets up everything. It is unusual for me to update a story twice while leaving the other one blank, but "Inside, The Night Wishing" is being a bitch right now, so I came to this one again.** **So no relationship has been introduced yet because Loki has yet to familiarize himself around older Joan. He still thinks of her as a child, and things might get conflicted and a little awkwardly intense as he tries to sort through that when "sexy times" are hinted at. This story is working out better than the last one I think, and I will be able to tie in everyone again as well which will work out nicely. Reviews Yeah!**


	7. Chapter 7

**LookAliveSunshine03****:**** Hehe, I'm a child sometimes too, and I thought that'd be funny! I definitely need to get moving on this dark part, I'm just not sure how to add it all in. They technically speaking already have a connection, but I could deepen it more. After this chapter, dark things will be taking off so stay tuned for something gothic and macabre. **

**AnApatheticAdolescent****:**** Oh thank gosh you are enjoying reading about her! It was something I felt was lacking last time and I am glad you feel strongly about her development. X-men indeed, it's totally awesome and I thought "why not take advantage of adding that in?!"**

**xxxRena****:**** Welcome and thank you. I hope this wasn't too long in the waiting!**

**DanAlaya****:**** Hehe, I scratch the surface of closeness here. It seems like a lot happens, but it's really almost a tease in compared to what I have planned for next chapter. Yes, yes, dark things indeed, and I still want that blackened feel that I had going on last time. She is pretty clever and will be able to figure out some of his motives, but Loki is the far better schemer here, and Joan may get in over her head. Yes, they both have some hurtful things to pull through, like the abandonment of each other. Hehe, no, never forget those lemons!**

**LOKI IS KING****:**** Yes, more Avenger time to happen this time around, now that I have a full-fledged plan in mind. Loki and his scheming will just never stop, but it's a good thing I think!**

**JobanaBallack**** :**** ROFL! Yes indeed, she did not see those bugs in her food coming! Glad I still have Tony in character, I always worry I am getting carried away with him. Yes, it must be dark for this is how things are for LOAN! Muhaha, but of course it's not to have the odd sweet moment, so I will try to make a balance. Damn LOLIOS spoil everything all the time, it's hard living up to my own standard! :P**

**TearStainedAshes****:**** Hehe, I tease with their reunion quite a bit here. It seems like a big moment happens, but not really enough to satisfy the many unanswered questions that are floating! Yep, make no mistake that she knew he was there, and Joan is ever determined to make him show himself! I love my angst, and I won't be letting go of it for this story, or for Halios' either (major angst, I should come with a warning label!) I can't wait for their relationship too, no more lock and chain for these two, things are gonna get real, I just have to keep the dark element in tact as promised (and of course le lemons!) **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC**

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Joan bit into her pizza with a strained look on her face. She was feeling under the weather as of recently, and it had nothing to do with the bad Thai food they had just eaten. Her body was filled with an icy chilled feeling of being followed. She hadn't spoke of it in the car, and even now she was skeptical to speak of it to Tony with Pepper present. She was after all, training to be a SHIELD agent, and panic or fear was looked upon as a disease or weakness, one that no doubt Fury already thought she possessed. Her attention turned to the Chrysler tower adjacent to where she was sitting in Stark Tower. The view from here was immaculate, and it was improbable that she had any onlookers from here. Still, she twirled a strand of her hair subconsciously around her finger, the feeling of someone else's hand still lingered as did the void that had filled her mind when she tried to read for brainwaves. It could just have been an easy conclusion that her mind was in a state of delirium and nothing but the wind had disturbed her, but she couldn't fool herself away from the real answer. He had found her again, only he was toying with her.

"Joan!" She blinked rapidly as she moved her furtive eyes to Tony who looked slightly irked that she hadn't been paying one ounce of attention to whatever story he was going over, "Geez you were ignoring me the whole time weren't you?!"

She ruffled her hair with her hand, "Sorry. Don't take this the wrong way, but I only listen to matters of relevance."

Tony frowned further as Pepper burst into chuckles, her face turning pink with enjoyment, "You'll have to share your secret with me sometime. I'd love to be able to ignore him when I've had a long day." She stood up with her plate, dropping it into the sink while Tony's eyes followed her with refrained aspiration.

"I thought you liked my stories." He said indignantly.

"Oh Tony." Pepper began, "I like a fraction of them, when they aren't about you doing something chauvinistic."

"They're all like that."

She rose a brow, "Exactly."

Joan watched their banter with a strangled smile. In a way it was entertaining, but she felt like more of an intruder than anything. She wasn't familiarized in the territory of relationships. Sure, she had had some otherwise appropriate dates when she was a teen student at X-mansion, but nothing had amounted from those innocent enactments. Mutant couples were always frowned upon in this day, and it was always difficult to go out in public, even when people couldn't distinguish her as a mutant. The word was still carried about in the papers, and it was a hard thing to stomach, "I need some air." She said at last though it had nothing to do with her previous thoughts.

"Well, you can step out on the terrace." Stark answered while thumbing to the direction, "Nice and private, and there's plenty of air."

"No, I feel like going out for a walk actually, just to clear my head. I'll try for your phone call again as well, though it may take time. Natasha and Clint are busy people, and I'm not really their friend, more like an apprentice if anything so they don't always rush to answer my calls."

He was drawn in by this information for only a second before his shoulders sagged, "Well, keep trying at any rate, and don't get killed on your walk."

"Hey, I'm not that tender footed, and I am street-smart. Really, I should scold you into behaving. If Fury ever found out that you did something stupid on my watch, I'd be stuck as a cadet forever."

"Joan, I feel offended. What have I ever done to lead you to assume I'd do something stupid?" He feigned hurt well, and Joan cracked a smile at the pathetic look on his face.

"Careful Joan, you fall for that and you're his slave for life." Pepper scolded playfully as she re-entered the room.

"I'll be sure to remember that." Said Joan as she parted ways to the elevator with her shoes from the evening in hand. She hadn't changed out of the tight black dress yet, thinking it likely that it would be the last time she would be able to fit into it anyhow. She stepped passed the steel doors of the elevator, allowing the doors to close before she stepped back into her shoes. Her phone was in her clutch purse and at the ready to attempt another call for Stark. She wasn't doing the business just for him though and she assumed he wasn't aware of that. If the threat was as great as SHIELD feared, then she would be willing to go forth against Fury to help the Avengers. Then again, it wasn't necessarily Fury who she would be up against; the council expressed their disdain for the superhero group during the first war, and on principle they would do so again.

The bell of the elevator signaled her stop and she stepped off at the lobby, not stopping for a moment as she went out into the night air of the city. The fall air was colder still, even since she last was outside in the parking lot of the restaurant. She pulled the collar of her jacket tighter as she took out her phone and dialed. The city was still busy as cars made commotion as they drove passed her walking figure. She kept her eyes down until she put the phone to her ear. The dial tone rang endlessly to her steps that were leading her to no clear destination. She was walking down a pathway lined with birch trees, and a bench at a corner where she stopped to sit once the other end of the line clicked.

"SHIELD Helicarrier, please state your name and ID number." The voice was so robotic, that it made Jarvis sound more human. The telephone operators at SHIELD were a group of very grey people, both bland in appearance and personality. The person speaking was a woman, and her voice was deep and smooth, but very impersonal.

"Delacroix, Joan, serial number seven, zero, seven, one."

"Please answer this question clear and precise. The date of birth of Jamison Delacroix."

"March, nineteen fifty-five on the seventeenth day."

"Please state what business you have Miss Delacroix, and I may assist you if possible."

"I'm looking to deliver a message to either Agent Romanoff or Agent Barton." Joan said patiently. Her eyes scanned around her when the air became stagnant and lonely, and her hand gripped the phone tighter with her building nerves.

"Both Agent Barton and Agent Romanoff are away, but you may leave a message for me to recite to them."

What she had to say wasn't exactly share worthy news. Her teeth ground in frustration as she huffed, "That is alright, I will call back at a later time, or if you could transfer them to me when they are available."

"Right away Miss." With curt politeness, the call was ended and Joan sat with a scowl on her face.

Her knees bobbled together as she sat back on the planked bench that was straining her spine at all the wrong angles. Normally this would have bothered her into readjusting, but she was more perturbed by the lack of response she was receiving from the two Agents. Had they know her reason, she doubted that they would have been so busy, at least finding a way to make time for her. She wanted to tell Tony to call himself, but it would land her in hot water and him as well for knowing too much. If possible, her mood had gone from agitated down to acerbic. She was invisible to the world, and the world was invisible to all of her problems. This would have been a more truthful statement, if it wasn't for the pair of jade eyes watching her away from across the street. The lights of the store behind his profile shaded his features, but Joan could make out the lines of his body and the gleam in his well-rounded eyes. She sat like a stone on the bench, unmoving even when the breeze blew. He was watching her and he was aware that she knew of his presence. Slowly he turned away, back into the crowd until she lost sight of his ravenous locks.

For a moment or two she was on the fence about what to do, though she was ultimately leaning towards a certain way, "Dammit." She swore under her breath, creating a fog in the cold air. How she so wanted not to follow him, but it was unlikely that she could wait any longer for him to act. This was all a head game, a way for him to try and cause a stir in her persona that she had crafted so keenly with SHIELD. Reluctantly her legs began to pull her to a stand, and she was soon rushing across the street to follow in the direction she was certain he left in.

She brushed against the shoulders of group of friends who were enjoying a night out on the town, oblivious to the young woman who otherwise would have been doing the same thing if it wasn't for circumstance. She escaped by them unnoticed, but he was nowhere to be seen. It occurred to her to perhaps call his name, but in doing such would draw attention. It was likely that if she tried with her mind, he would be evading her as well. She shouldn't even be going after him alone, but old ties and words left unsaid were driving her to one goal; a reunion that was forthcoming, whether she wished it or not. He must have known it to, but it did not explain his elusive behavior. She doubted instantly that it was a case of nerves; he was never one to be so humble. It was with purpose that he was creating this chase, and it began to dawn on her as she entered into a quieter section of the street. He was before her, walking away at a casual pace, but she pursued the glimpse she had caught of his black hair. She followed into an open courtyard, not quite large enough to be a park. A belt of fir trees surrounded her in the sequestered area while the moon slipped through the breaks through the brushed ceiling.

"I must be losing my mind." She uttered silently to herself.

"Not yet dearie, but you'll be there soon."

Her skin prickled from the sound of his voice. He was directly behind her, but she couldn't bring herself to face the past she had been always running from. His tone was apathetic and cold, and she felt much hate for him in that moment, "Here you are…only seventeen years late." Her tone bold and with traces of resentment.

A chilly huff escaped him, and she heard the shifting of his feet on the needled ground, "Are we really going to skip over the pleasantries and get down to the juvenile reasons of our parting? I never expected much from you seeing as you are what you are, but this is a spot disappointing, even for you. SHIELD must not train their operatives so well; I half expected it to be you sneaking up on me."

"Nice try, but I'm not an Agent yet." She sucked in a cold breath and turned to face him. He was almost exactly the same as he used to be, like looking into an old photograph. He was fair in face, though it was marked with a sinister look that judged and sentenced her all in one glance. In nothing but the pale of the moon, he shone like a wax figure of delicate proportion. His eyes and nose were both angular in a wicked way and he bore a thinned lip smile on his ivory face. His hair was like the cloaking of a ravens wing, naked of light, but iridescent from the glare of a beacon He was clothed in human garb, and he needed no other adornment other than his own allure which was dark and mystifying, "How did you know it was me before, and don't lie, I know it was you I felt earlier today."

He seemed to falsely maul over this, instead putting his time into memorizing her new face. She was soured by his presence, it showed in the hazel bands of her eyes. The air blew tightly threw the trees, causing only a small stir to tousle her already disheveled hair. In her left hand was a beaded bag that she clung desperately to, though she betrayed nothing in her look as to say what was so importantly stashed within. She was dressed in a constricting fabric that resembled blackened tar painted onto her body. She had been a small child, and all that had sprouted was a flawed and willowy form which was perhaps not so proportioned like the other women of Midgard. Her round cheeks were still flushed pink like they had always been, though they looked more angular with her feminine face now. He laughed finally, a short chuckle that held mockery and contempt, "Joan, it was you who called out to me. I was simply responding to such a heartening gesture."

"After all this time, that is all it took? And here I thought I would have to go as far as to scream to get you to come." His eyes grew dangerous from her stiff demeanor, "But, I can't help but think that the real reason you are here now is because you have nowhere else to go, and no one else to turn to. It must have been such a thrill to know that the child you once used was nearby."

"It was you who decided to turn away." He reminded her with a sneer.

"I outgrew you." She said at once, "I didn't need you anymore, your use was only something a child would cling to, and I was as such for a time, before I came to understand that you can't rely on others for words of comfort or advice. You grew apart from me as well, but I care little for the reasoning's of that."

"A smooth lie Joan. Perhaps you remember more of what I taught you than we both realize." His face turned to a sharp scowl, "How long it must have ate at you as you thought of my abandonment. I am sure you stumped to such thoughts as far as to think it was something you did mistakenly. Did you think that by cutting our connection that you would wound me in the same way I wounded you?" It was said in such a condescending tone that she thought she might become sick from it.

"I was a child. I wasn't as vindictive as you. How could I ever be, when you thrive in it?"

"You are still a child Joan. After all this time, you still haven't begun to comprehend what my inner workings really are."

She laughed hauntingly, "Well I can admit to that. What was the purpose of dragging me out here other than to chastise me?"

He dodged the question with grace, "I see you have finally understood the meaning of that word."

She frowned with perplexity, "You remember that?"

"What?!" For a moment he seemed surprised with himself from the revelation. His expression had gone from passive to bewilderment momentarily before he covered with a shrewd glare.

"I'm just astonished is all. Something so irrelevant, yet you jumped on the opportunity to bring it up instantly."

"A God's memory far outweighs that of a human." He deadpanned.

Human, if only she could classify herself as such. She thought in an instant what her life would have been like had she not been of mutated blood. She would never have gone to X-mansion and created the bonds with the few people that she cherished, nor would she be working for SHIELD. She also would not have been graced by Loki's mind connection and this conversation would have never taken place, "If I were a human." She mumbled.

"Is it so horrible being a mutant?" Her astounded look had him smiling in sick satisfaction, "I've been here longer than you might think, and I keep track of the current on goings of his world. Your kind seems to cause quite the stir."

"My kind?" She said aloud, "That is a hell of a thing to say to me after all you have done with those wretched things you called an army. I'm guessing your throne isn't so high now after losing, is it your majesty?!"

He took a threatening step towards her and his hands latched onto her forearms in a vice grip. The pain may have been worse, had he kept up with the grip, but he recoiled abruptly as if he could not bear to touch her even through the sleeves of her leather jacket. She gazed at him in interest as he collected his composure, though his face was still flared from rage, "You had known it was me, yes?"

"Of course. The number of people with the name 'Loki' has been lessening these days." She wanted to add _'I knew it was your face because it was the one I had been waiting for over a decade'_, but now her feelings said otherwise, and she was not so glad as to have him back in her life without warning.

"It hadn't occurred to me to come find you when I was here. It was of an insignificant matter, one that I had long forgotten until you reached out to me days ago."

"A mistake I won't be making again. I don't want anything to do with you." Said Joan tightly.

"So this is how it will be." He seemed bored by her words, "You'll hate me like everyone else. I cannot say I am surprised, as it is a likely reaction to come from one such as you."

"Right, someone like me." She was unused to this treatment from him, "You're not the same someone I used to know."

"And how do you remember me?" The question was genuine, perhaps the most sincere words he had spoken to her during the duration of their conversation.

"You were kinder. It may have only been for the reason that I was a child of course, but I honestly listened to everything you had to say. You weren't always so patient either, and I can see that hasn't changed."

"I'm the result of what time has made me into. I've been molded and crafted to survive the harsh existence I have been dealt, and caring for the feelings of a child was no longer relevant."

"You made many of those mistakes yourself no doubt."

"Perhaps I would be willing to share, if you promise to meet with me again." He countered in tones of velvet that were both soft and strangling.

Her brows furrowed and she took a step back from him, suddenly feeling smothered from his close proximity, "I—no I don't wish to see you again."

He smirked, "How sweet of you to actually think you have a choice." His eyes were sinfully dark as he shot her a stone cold expression.

"You think you can just invade my life when it suits you?" She asked hotly. She nearly rolled her ankle in her heel as she took another step back. He was of a dangerous nature, one that was threatening the very fabric of life that she had grown accustomed to, yet it was not so plain a solution as to just walk away. She cursed the history she shared with this man, whom now looked only years older than herself.

"Oh yes, and it does suit me very well at this moment."

"What do you want from me?" She whispered.

"Answers, or perhaps more. When the time comes that I deem you useful or not, I will let you know."

"It will never happen. I won't go looking for you again, and you cannot come to me."

"So avoidance is your choice?" He seemed humored, "That will prove useless Joan. When I tell you I have words left unsaid, then you can be sure I will find you. You can make it easier on yourself by coming to meet with me." A slip of paper appeared in his hand and he held it out for her at a distance to take. It seemed more like a slip of death as she was forced to stretch a tentative hand out to reach it. It was the longest distance she felt she had ever had to cross, for as she grew closer it seemed he was pulling away. He let it slide from his fingers with ease when she reached it, while grinning in triumph all the same, "In case you change your stubborn mind that is where I will be waiting. Don't disappoint me by being late."

She looked up again to argue against his certain judgment that she would show, but he was no longer standing before her. She spun her head around in both directions wildly, but Loki had vanished beyond her sight, and she was left gaping in a wooded area with nothing but an address in her hand. She was left vexed as she stared at the scripted numbers jotted down on the paper, wondering how he had found the time and money to acquire an apartment. She crumpled the note in her hand, but not before stashing it away in her beaded bag for safe keeping. The decision was yet before her, but she had a feeling her mind had already been made up for her. He would only cause chaos in her calm life if she didn't show for their appointment. It was only words that needed to be exchanged, and she was rather curious with a question or two of her own for him to answer. If she said no, she could only imagine what his reaction to that would be, and no matter what she envisioned in her mind, the visit to meet with him always ended with better results. It was final; she would be going to see Loki again.

She stepped out from the small isolated patch of forest, and headed back onto a main street of the city, where nothing had changed in her absence. Her vision of Stark tower helped lead her back through all the sights she had passed, and soon she was back in the lobby, waiting for the elevator to return. Her phone had yet to break silence, and it was just another item added to her agenda for tomorrow. The doors pulled open, and she entered the lift with a heavy heart, a reluctant pace taking hold of her active nature. The feelings of being followed had not dispersed since earlier, and she wondered just how far off he had truly left her to begin with. All was silent and still, and her friend remained in the shadow of her heart.

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**Long, fun chapter for me, and I hope it turned out to be equally enjoyable for you! I figured a reunion with Loki would not be big and explosive considering the circumstances of their parting. Things are strained at best right now, and this was scratching the surface of what's to come. Flashbacks will now enter the scene as well, and I will get moving on the "big" plot too, which is all good fun. Let me know what you think, and for a clue in to next chapter, Joan and Loki talk in his desolate apartment, any predictions on how that will go?! Reviews yeah!**


	8. Chapter 8

**DanAlaya**** :**** Hehe, yep I under exaggerated it was an all-out hate feast! Oh hehe, Loki may seem calm yet, but I have the most vengeful revenge plan that he will produce on Joan, it's downright evil (no not non-con, I tried that already 0_o)" They definitely will keep coming back to the issue of abandonment that was caused by both parties, because Loki needs to understand Joan's reasoning as well as she needs to hear his. Being a child, she had a picture perfect image of him that quickly turned foul. Once she pushes him too far, we all know he will push back, and it won't be pretty!**

**LookAliveSunshine03****:**** Yes, I feel like every time I finish a chapter, I have so much left to say between the two of them! Hehe, I love Pepper and Tony in both stories and the films, they are too great together! More LOAN conversation here, and it ugh, goes somewhat bad…again. **

**JobanaBallack****:**** Hehe I am glad my updating feels like a b-day present! Perhaps for my birthday I should get a day off (but we both know I won't do that!) No usch happy conversation yet, and they totally have a warped relationship unlike LOLIOS. *Sighs* I gotta get to those lemons yet, and I swear I will try my best, because I promised them so much last time. **

**DoctorLokiLove****:**** So glad I nailed the conversation scene! I think it sets the tone for what their relationship is going to look like from here, and we get another dark and foreboding convo again. Three cheers for keeping Loki in character, that's no easy feat! I picked this one to update over my other story, because I am having fun with it right now too! **

**InkyPhoenix****:**** Hope I tickle your curiosity some more!**

**LOKI IS KING****:**** Yes, the genre is going to be all over the place sometimes because I can have playful banter, yet angst going on too because of LOAN! Pepper and Tony always stealing the show, and now LOAN has entered the picture. It's gonna get more dark and naughty yet, so stay tuned!**

**syrenia'noir****:**** Oh wow, welcome again then, since I made you go through the trouble of reading part one. Glad you took to part two, because I have a feeling some fans were pissed that I decided to change it. I happen to love the X-men mutants, and I was glad I established Joan as one of them this time. Hehe, loved first class, and I'm afraid if I add Erik and Charles I may get somewhat distracted, but they could make an appearance yet, as will some other mutants since this is an all-out Marvel fun fair of nonsense! Woo hoo, I love character development and I am glad to know I handle it well, as well as my plots. Here's a fast update, and I hope you enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing buy my OC**

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"_What does it look like, where you live?" Joan asked so suddenly whilst Loki lay rested in his chambers. He was nursing a shoulder injury from a mock battle, and was rather immersed in the solitude it provided him. A visit from Joan wasn't unwelcome though, and he smiled vaguely._

"_Why so curious to know?" He wondered to her, though guessed the answer immediately. It seemed since he had encountered her on Earth, she was set on proving his existence to be real and not some fabrication of her mind. What an endearing child she proved to be, and it was one of the seldom things that had him smiling as of late. Asgard was all in talks of summer festivals and the changing of the seasons while Thor and his friends ate up the thoughts of it. Never Loki though for he detested the thoughts of dancing and feasting in a crowded room, and was rather a hedonist when it came to such issues. A few hours dancing would likely cause him more pain than pleasure._

"_You seemed normal to me, and I don't believe you come from somewhere else." Her statement was firm as he blinked rapidly to her tone._

_He remained stunned for a moment on how to describe Asgard. It certainly was a splendor all in its own and there were no other realms that could hold a candle to Eternal flame of Asgard. These golden halls were his to roam free, even when he was tossed weary looks from naysayers, "Child, I do not think you will believe in such tales if I told you."_

"_I'm a child, and I'm willing to believe anything. My imagination is good; I got a B in writing a story."_

"_Ah Joan, you'll give me grey hairs before my time." He chuckled to himself in the silent room, while pausing for a moment to reflect on what story a child could possibly write, "Well, where I come from, everything, down to the very floor under your feet, is covered in gold. I live in a palace that rests high above dark waters and under a starry sky of two suns."_

"_You live in a castle!?" Her voice was a gasp of exasperation, and Loki had to no trouble distinguishing what her fazed expression would have looked like._

"_Indeed I do. I suppose you would relate my world to your medieval times, if you can recall those."_

"_I know what medieval means!" She argued in a whine._

"_Yes well, capes are still high in fashion, and many wield swords for battle."_

"_Do girls get to wear big, fancy dresses?" Was her bewildered question._

"_Erm—yes they do." He supposed something as such would attract a young child, though it bored him greatly, "We also resort to magic as preferred to your sciences."_

"_I know that, you made that glowing ball in your hand in my room, remember?" _

"_Of course I do remember, though I thought it had slipped by you unnoticed." He carefully stated, while a feeling of renounced flattery attempted to dawn on him, "How did magic make you feel?"_

"_It was amazing, and I wish I could do it." He waited during the pregnant to pause for her to continue, though her next question was a whisper in his ear, "When will you come back again?"_

_He sat up on his feathered pillows while his head brushed against the oak headboard. It was a question that had caught him off guard with its sudden appearance, and he was with tact when answering her carefully, "I will return as soon as I can, and I promise I am making room for it."_

"_Oh good!" She exclaimed, "You must be so bored in my world though."_

"_Not entirely." A lie, but one he was willing to make without harm._

"_I don't suppose I'll ever get to see your world." Said Joan in melancholy._

_He knew the truth was not valid, and as he lied to her for a second time, he felt like a treacherous villain, "Aye but Joan, you just might."_

ooOOoo

Loki awoke calmly, even as he was drenched in a cold and clammy sweat from a vigorous night of dreaming. He had remembered things that had long since been forgotten on his long, winding path of revenge. His mind was warped as he stared at the popcorn ceiling of his not so impressive apartment. The lilac bedspread was strewn down to his waist from intervals of tossing and turning. Something had stirred because of the momentous visit with Joan last night. No care had been showed from him to his past memories of her, yet so abruptly he was forced into remembering more of the promises he had never made good on. He wasn't to blame though, for Joan too decided to end their rather ludicrous relationship when she had 'outgrown' him. Those were words he had yet to be convinced of, and he would soon push on for the real purpose of her departure.

It was difficult to converse with her when his mind often betrayed what he was truly seeing. Should she not be shorter and weeping back home with her parents? It was easy enough to get along with a child before, for she had been simple to manipulate, but adult Joan was not so naïve, at least not at a first glance. He knew it to be a rouse, and he would shake it out from her, to find the good-natured and innocent youth that still lurked beneath. He had a connection with that Joan, not this new one who had appeared unwanted in his life. Too fast had she aged, and had filled out if only just, in all the womanly places. It was unsettling to be around her as a friend when he could think of no other adult he had ever shared a connection with that wasn't 'family'. The warriors had tolerated him for Thor, though he thought them all daft anyhow and Sigyn was incomparable for she was his wife and lover. The Silver tongue was quick, but it was not all he would require if he was to truly trick Joan into siding with him. Had he known a child was to be so important in the future, he would have tended to her more readily with pampering.

He slipped out from the stifling covers, and decided for a quick shower in his not so splendid bathroom. Something's he was still adjusting to, and Midgard's powder rooms were not as eloquent as the one he had used as a Prince on Asgard. His tub was now made of egg shell white porcelain in replace of the large bronze bath he had once practiced hygiene in. The faucet was made of a cheap metal that let the water flow unevenly from the calcium buildup. He was also deterred from the plastic curtain that came with the stand-up shower. It constantly clung to him, and he'd rather tear the thing down if it wasn't there for the sole purpose to keep the floors dry. Asgard had no stand-up showers, people only bathed in the houses or of their own personal powder rooms, and this predicament left him feeling more than ordinary. Luckily enough he favored the feel of cold water, and the sharp pelts made him breathe heavier as it sprayed his arched back. He watched the water flow down his vanilla skin, until circling down the drain in a small cyclone. His eyes were shut while he let the damp spring water soak into his hair. Something was particularly funny to him at the moment, and it was the fact that Joan was the closest thing in his mind while Sigyn was millions of miles away to both his location and his heart. Their marriage was rather estranged for years, and she had come to be more of a possession to him as the years had grown old. She was something now placed on his shelf to collect dust, and by circumstance it was an occurrence unlikely to change. He shared no connection to her, not even a child, for his own had come from a different woman under different pretenses. She was just another secret left in the dark, like so many before her. He wondered briefly is Joan could be considered one of those things. It remained the only secret that no one could guess at, and it had never been founded out about, something he had liked about the whole situation.

He shut the stream of water off, and dried with a towel before the mirror. It was a sad state of affairs he witnessed in his reflection. His whole face was sunken in, and his eyes looked swelled with malcontent. He never really was a pleasant person, though he remembered looking more approachable than he did presently. Though he was fair, there was something haunting and unearthly about his gaze that sent people into quivers.

He circled his room, and threw on a soft, graphite colored sweater with a pair of black pants. The human garb was something he actually could stomach, though his color selection never ventured far from black, green and grey. He just got finished with towel drying his hair, when a harsh knock erupted from the door. It was his first visitor and he would have been surprised to find anyone there that wasn't Joan, "Back so soon?" He said in good-nature to her scowling face when he had revealed himself from the door.

"This was the best time to slip away, and I want to get this over with." She stepped under his arm, and invited herself into his lofty apartment. Her eyes lingered on the walls for the briefest of moments with casual curiosity. He shut the door and leaned against the wall as they stood apart in queer silence of the day. Her features were alight now, though she looked more venomous than last night. She had gotten over the initial shock, and after becoming adapted to the idea, she was hard as stone, "You in a human world is unsettling."

"In the times I have spoken to you personally, I was always in human clothing."

"Indeed, the whole two times I've met you."

"Such a cynic." He scandalized, "Have you always been as such?"

"I'm what time has turned me into." His eyes narrowed in on a fraction while studying her close. She was wearing a heavy trench coat the color of creamy coffee and he could see that her legs were bare as she stood in red heels. Those shoes were horrible and he wanted her to take them off, both because of the color and because she seemed so business casual, once again disconcerting to him that she was no longer a pawn to be played, "I hope you are not here for another desperate ploy at obtaining Earth."

"No, I am in hiding, or was that too difficult to comprehend for you?"

She broke her eye contact with him and gazed around the room once more, "I suppose I can see that, though it seems bizarre to return to the realm that you attempted to steal."

"There is no viable option left for me, and I think you are aware of that." His voice was serene as he said this, trying to ease his patience for her.

"What, because I know that an enemy hunts you? How much of that conversation did you overhear?"

"Enough to know that an enemy hunts me." He smiled in superiority to her huff, "Perhaps you would like to enlighten me further?"

"So say if I did; what's in it for me?" He ground his teeth at her defiant nature, and how it boiled his blood for her to think she would gain leverage so easily over him without consequence.

"This isn't a bargaining ship Joan. I asked you here for answers, and you'll see little of reward coming from me."

"But then it really isn't my interest to help you, and I've been too polite to point out that I could walk out that door at any time."

"Could you?" He asked in thrill excitement of the challenge. She would see no mercy either, and it was an easy bluff to call, even as he tested her further by locking the door with a wave of his hand. As he knew she would, her eyes traveled to the brass lock with unrest, "You may go…if you can."

Her fears were swallowed down and she looked at him once more, "So this is all about personal gain?"

"Is it not always as such?"

She traveled to the large chair in the corner, plopping down unceremoniously as she crossed her legs and untied the belt of her coat. He felt threatened by the obnoxious color of her dress that was set in vibrant tones of red against her caramel hair. It was everything a full voluptuous woman would wear, but not his little Joan, "I would ask that you cover up that odious dress. The color is making my eyes bleed." He sneered in distaste. It wasn't so much the color after all, and he was more put-out by the low neck line that showed her cleavage as she breathed steadily. It hiked up her thighs as she crossed her legs, and he suddenly felt in a room with a harlot stranger.

"It was precisely the reason I picked this one. I wanted to see if you really were as jealous and juvenile as Stark has been saying to me after a whole week. A rumor that was true, I thought I'd never see the day." She laughed bitterly, but made no move to grant his request.

"Why did you choose to cut your ties to me?" His change in topic made her eyes bulge from shock, but he was quite serious when wanting this answer, while playing it careful not to let on about how much it had truly affected him.

"Why did you ignore me?" She rebuked softer.

"Ah." He said in sanguine realization, "I have my answer as I suspected. It was only because of childish revenge. I was not giving all my attentions to you, so you thought in an act of defense that it wise to lessen your hurt by condemning me to your silence? I'll admit that eases my mind to know it was out of frivolous purpose."

She took unkindly to his mockery of her reasoning, "You'd know all about childish revenge and frivolous purpose wouldn't you?"

"You know nothing about that, so don't pretend to be invested in my past now." He said offhandedly to brush her off. For a moment she made no move in the chair, and he wondered if she had even been listening.

"How am I supposed to help you?" She was standing close to him so suddenly that he wondered how he had not heard her make a sound. His sage eyes met her hazel ones for a moment, and he imagined Joan as she once was again. The care of a child was still in her, she had just hidden it away from him with her age, to a place that was unyielding.

"This is not surprising, but I am looking after my own skin for it is my proclivity to do so. Your Earth is unprepared for the mindless hate that is currently soaring the cosmos. It isn't this realm he is after, or any realm. He wants the entire universe in the cold grasp of deaths hand, and it will be meaningless to try and prevent that."

She gasped, "Why do you speak of such horrible things?"

"Come now Joan, do not be so deluded. I was one person who tried for the affections and perks of an entire realm. It is the only real conclusion that the man who ruled me would set his sights on something more, and this is not my delirium speaking."

"But then, if what you say is true, we've already lost."

He nodded candidly, "It is the one acceptance you should be willing to face. This realm and those fools at SHIELD should make their peace with it, as I have come to these passed months in solitude."

"Just because you would give up on Earth, does not mean the rest of us will bow to a dictator while lying on our backs." She stepped away from him in disgust, "If you truly know anything about humans, you'd know we will not do what you command."

"But I don't know humans!" He answered back crossly, and she winced from his temper, "I take no care in how you all get on, and I'd rather it remain as such. You all better be prepared for what is to come, if you want your near meaningless existence to stand for anything."

"Is this some riddle, or have I been played the fool?" said Joan drily as she looked on him with hard eyes, "I think it's best if I leave."

"No, don't leave." He pleaded suddenly, "We've only just been reacquainted and we are on the same side, are we not?"

"You and I?" She asked cryptically, "I was once a friend to you Loki, but that time is long spent. We are not on the same side any more…and we never will be." She made the door unlock on her own accord with her mind, and he was too stiff to stop her as she made on a miserable exit, the tails of her coat flying behind her.

The door shut on its own account, and his hand rubbed down the wood panel in longing to go after her. He rested his head down against the wood and gritted his teeth in a vicious rage. The sound of his own name on her tongue had his mind reeling dizzy, but under wildly different circumstances. A sexual strangeness was left in him, one that no doubt had escaped unnoticed by her. It was a sinful poison, one that he would not allow himself to feel for she was yet such a child still in his mind, and anything above platonic would not be accepted on her part. The smell of her perfume lingered in scents of spiced chamomile and he hated being left on his own in this room. Her departure left him relieved but also with sad regret. He let a dark groan leave his lips while cursing his ill-mannered time at being landed with lust. It would relent in passing days, and his denial of seeing her would help with that. He walked without a clear goal, and ended up crashing onto the bed, just as soon as the doors lock with a wave of his hand.

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**Fun, fun, fun, er—sorry no lemons yet, but I haven't made great strides in their relationship…until now! Yes, I plan for this story to be more mature and filled with matures themes unlike Halios'. This one is my free time to write, and I still have a plot with Thanos to deduct as well, so you can be sure it won't be all LOAN every chapter either. So, how did I do with their emotions on this chapter, and how was the little flashback of child Joan again. I know I missed her! Reviews yeah!**


	9. Chapter 9

**DoctorLokiLove****: So I'm happy to hear I am getting the personalities right, and I am glad the way Joan is working out for the better this time around. Loki is definitely vexed by his emotions for Joan, and it no doubt would be hard to grasp strange feelings for her seeing as he was used to her as a child for so long. Indeed, he must play it careful or else it will be a repeat of Sigyn, something he doesn't want to happen but he'll have to explore why his past relationship failed in the first place. This chapter is quite emotionally stimulated for Loki, I hope you like! **

**JobanaBallack****:**** My, you readers are loving little Joan, and I was glad to resurface her once again, and keep your eyes peeled for her return again. The relationship had begun again, and it is load with new emotions now that such a gap has been put between the years of her aging. I don't expect things to go back to the way they were, but Loki is going to have to sort through that himself. Yeah, now I have to really research Thanos (I don't know comics :( ) Hehe, they will have more arguments yet, though this chapter takes quite a different turn just for Loki. Read on and see how that goes! **

**LOKI IS KING:**** The flashbacks are great to explore, and I like shifting to kid Joan, she's a cutie! Oh yes, Loki is always scheming, but it may have to be put on the back burner if Thanos wants his ass! PS, we live in a Packers nation, and when you use fighting words, best be prepared to back em' up!**

**ACHound-Turhu****:**** Yes, this story is rough around the ages and doesn't hold anything back, which may make some readers cringe or celebrate in delight. Emotion is key, and I am working my best to make it seem real for the both of them. Hehe, I never know what to say an AN's either when addressing readers. 'Guy's' seems wrong because most of my fans will be females, but I hate writing the word gal's! Rest assured though, I'm a woman! **

**morbidly-funny:**** Glad you are loving him, I'm trying to venture away from the Loki I have going with Halios seeing as this relationship differs quite a bit. **

**LookAliveSunshine03:**** Aye yes, I was glad I had both past and present written last chapter, it's much easier to contrast Joan from what she used to be, and how she has hardened. I still love kid Joan, and stay tuned for her to enter again later. Yes, their relationship is going to be vastly different than his with Halios, which I like to stress in case readers don't favor dark things, they can pull out now. I like dark Loki too, and this chapter should raise peoples hopes this this story will be Mature!**

**Spark and Fire****:**** Welcome and if you've come this far, I hope you are enjoying. I happen to hate the first draft of this story, despite the fact that it landed me many reviews, I was never thrilled with the weak plot. This one is more solid and emotional, which I know not everyone likes, but I needed to write it for my own peace of mind. I would recommend my other series that starts with "The Hate Inside Me", it is a more kinder and not so dark tale as this one will be.**

**DanAlaya****:**** Yes, I am so looking forward to their relationship, even though it may be slow going because Joan no longer trusts Loki (which is understandable) She is rather vindictive now, even if she'd argue that fact. I would agree, everyone was pleased that child Joan was back for another does last chapter and I will be keeping her in mind, so look for more of her yet. It definitely was the foundation of where LOAN first began, and it should be their goal to get back to that if circumstance doesn't get in the way first. More dark Loki to come, I am going gradual so it doesn't seem like he's a sadist either, just more of a reluctant villain who is rather indifferent to the human condition. **

**xxxRena:**** Great chapter you say?! I am happy to hear, and be ready for more child Joan in the future as more flashbacks come into this!**

**TearStainedAshes****:**** Yes, the reunion seemed so underwhelming yet explosive all at once, and it wasn't just clawing at each other in uncontrolled hate, I want them to have a subtle and dark relationship that really makes the heart pound! Oh that apartment, I can picture it in my mind and I imagine its use would only be good for people throwing their clothes off XD Man, I got to remember to keep adding in child Joan, people are really impressed with her, more than I thought possible! We are seeing a totally different Loki here than I tried to conjure last time; he is both devastated and dark but also quite apathetic to many of the things going on around him. He's making mistakes with Joan already, and whether she has noticed his slip-ups have yet to be confirmed. Hehe, well this chapter may impress you. I have not reached full lemon yet, but it is a much more significant dent than I ever got in the first draft and I hope people feel satisfied!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC**

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Joan made it back to Stark tower in record time after flying down the street with a look of pure purpose devouring her face. She tied the belt of her jacket tight; fighting off the cold air from both outside, and from the leftover feelings the visit in Loki's apartment had brought onto her. He was certainly the villainous character everyone had made him out to be, and she could not stomach any more visits with him, for it was like visiting a grave of a former friend who had once lived. He mocked humanity, making her lose her humility in the process as he all but abolished her reason. She was aghast to his furbished personality, and she was still left lingering for answer about why he had begun to ignore her in the first place. The matter of importance of that question seemed limp now, for it had mattered not to him the reasoning's of her abandonment. To openly laugh in her face had left her sluggish, though she didn't let it show on her tenacious face. She burst into the penthouse with prosperity, causing Stark to pause mid-sip on his water bottle.

"Do you want to take me to SHIELD Helicarrier today?" She asked forward with her hands firmly on her hips. She looked like a woman to be in command, and even Stark was watching her with reverence.

He sputtered on his water, it dripping down his chin as he set the bottle down at the bar, "Wait, like right now?"

"Yes, I have some things to talk to Fury about, and you might get a chance to see Barton and Romanoff." She tapped her heel impatiently, "Well, what do you say?"

"I say, I hope you like heights, because I'm going to have to fly you up there with me." He straightened his languid shoulders and rolled his neck, "No puking on the suit."

"I can handle a little G-force; just promise me that I won't splatter to the ground to my untimely demise." Stark pretended to ponder the question before breaking out into a grin, "I assume you are all in for this?" She pressed on.

"Oh yeah, a chance to break Fury's perfect workings that he likes to call 'order', I wouldn't miss that for anything…well maybe just one thing, but Pepper isn't here."

Joan pulled a face, "I don't need to be any more informed on what you do in your private life, thanks."

"I'd like to be more informed with what's happening in yours. Where did you sneak off to so early, and am I led to believe that you are dressed like a hooker under that coat?" His lips quirked jokingly, but her thoughts on the dress now felt as such. She had worn it for spite because of the color, but the design was her own worst enemy, and she desired a desperate change if it wouldn't draw attention, "So, any strange dates that I am going to have to tell Nicholas about?"

She sniggered without regard, "Did you just call him Nicholas?!"

"Well yes, but you're dodging the question."

She sighed, "No Tony, I am not seeing anyone. SHIELD isn't exactly promoting e-harmony to all of its employees. SHIELD agents marry when they are retired, so I'm looking at a good forty years of being single yet."

"Hmm, don't sweat it. I was single for more than thirty years."

"Lightweight." Joan muttered, "Hurry up then, we still have to track the Helicarrier before we can climb aboard. I'm not telling Fury of my visit beforehand, what I have to say is important and he'll just blow me off in a phone call."

"Do I get to know the gossip?" Stark said, his brow raised in meddling.

"If you are permitted to sit in with me and Fury, but I can't tell you right now because I've already informed you on more than I should have, and my loyalties have to stay with SHIELD I'm afraid."

He breathed a haggard sigh, "If you say so, but I think you'd like it better on my team."

"SHIELD and Avengers are one in the same Stark, only we aren't so super."

"_They_ aren't, but _you_ are." He corrected, "You have to admit that having a mutation puts you a step above the rest, and I think Fury worries for that. He knows you are above them, so he tries to bring you down to a normal level."

"I'm no glory seeker, I don't flaunt my potential."

"A few more months living here and you just might adopt some of my habits about flaunting." He boasted before leaving the room. Joan held herself by her arms, wondering if that was a plausible event to occur. She was often told by Charles to be proud of her mutation, and in every way she was, but there was a fear to prove it. She lacked confidence in her skill, and it was most certainly something Stark would be an apt teacher for. It was a provocation put forth by him to prompt her in to open use of talents, but she only wondered if she would be able to take the bait.

ooOOoo

Loki was feeling somnolent, but he could not close his eyes for more than a second before he was jolted back from incongruous thoughts about Joan. Apparently his mind had no problem disobeying his emotions when it came to dishonored thoughts about the telepath. She was a child in his heart, but his thoughts traveled to other situations, fantasies that were both euphoric and intoxicating. She would see disgust in his habit, he even held it for himself after all and he had to try and remain vigilant when it came to rejecting his want of her body. It was just her body; he desired nothing more from her because of their thick and viscous past that was blended into a stew of guilt. If only for a moment, he could forget that other side of her and just focus on pure lust and raw emotion, something that was hard to come by within him.

His dreams were ghastly, but brought a small thrill of delight all the same. He would be on Asgard, and would be wounded from a battle that he had heroically gallivanted into with Thor and the warriors three. Bleeding and on horseback, he would return to the citadel while sporting his new wounds, only to be ushered to his chambers by his mother where a healer awaited. The hall would be dimly lit as he passed the torches on the wall to his door. Everything was exactly how he had left it, only the woman waiting on the edge of his bed was someone else entirely. She was Joan, dressed in a pure white gossamer textured gown that laced down her arms to the middle of her calves. Only her toes graced the cold stone floor of his room, and his eyes traveled up from them, stopping every so often as he took in the nakedness that was visible from beneath. Everything, down to the loose waves of her hair was Joan, all except for the smile. It was too sweet and innocent, betraying his present thoughts of how he knew her to be. She had grown rather shrewd and vindictive, even if she was too proud to admit to that.

His eyes turned back to dream Joan and she stood off the bed in cool silence, beckoning him closer with her eyes. He made to followed, but waned when the wound at his side pulled aggressively. Thin hands wrapped around him carefully and Joan's face was inches from his as she gazed serenely, "Come with me." She uttered and he let her lead him down to the bed. He was propped up against the pillows as his eyes followed her actions with bliss. A basin of water was situated on a side table and she dipped a sponge to soak up the suds, "Are you going to undress, or would you like me to help you?" She was sitting by his side with her legs curled behind her, her hands running down his thigh with grace.

He felt a tight tugging in his stomach as well as in his loins from those sensual words, "By all means, do as you will." He smirked handsomely as she started to lean forward on him, reaching for the buttons of his shirt after his armor had been stripped off him to assess the damage of his ailment. Her nimble hands worked down the front of his cotton material, and she moved closer to reach the bottom of the hem. He let her rest on his lap; his hands holding down on the soft of her hips that he easily squeeze through the flimsy fabric of her dress. Her wants and desires were suppressed as the closed her eyes from his forwardness. It was so plain on her face that she wanted to moan from the stifling heat, but she extended her hand back for the sponge, squeezed out the dripping water and brought it down on his flesh. He wanted to be affiliated in the action of her hands that squeezed, praying that she would fist the sheets as well as something else on his body.

The water was warm and silky down the front of his chest as she went at him in light motions. He was struggling to breathe as his eyes fluttered from the activity that she was stirring in his constricting pants, which were now bunching up from his aching member. As she moved up and down with the sponge, her hips would rock into him, stroking him with flush hips that were barely covered behind the skirt of her gown. Her nails skimmed his nipple as she brushed passed it with the sponge, and the water cooled the sharp burning scratch she had marked him with. She disposed the sponge into the basin to collect new water, and his eyes opened to see her staring, "I need to see your side, may I remove your shirt?" She was welcome to remove more than that, and this slow aching foreplay was trying his patience. He wanted her beneath him with his throbbing manhood sheathed inside her, crying out. He supposed there was something to be had about how her attentions where solely for him, and that quelled his fire, if only a small amount.

Her arms wrapped around his middle as she made to pull the shirt back off his arms. Her hardening nipples met with the dampness of his chest, and he felt the small buds scraping against him, begging to be released from behind the veil of clothing. She pulled back as the shirt left his torso, and his eyes quickly dipped down to the front of her, where the wet fabric clung tightly to her modest chest and he was able to view the pink tips that were standing in salute. He saw the curves of her hips and the dip of her belly button, reaching a hand out as he brushed over her taunt stomach from the temptation. She had brought the dripping sponge back to his side, and was sopping up the dried blood of his wound tenderly. He was freely exploring her now as she sat fully on his lap. He breathed in the scent of her hair while his hands explored her mounds, squeezing them and pinching through the material as she let out a small squeak. Her breathing had grown laboured and her hands had stilled on his side as she let the waterlogged sponge fall to the floor. One arm rested around his shoulder while he felt her other one begin to travel down from the top of his sternum. He had hiked the gown up her thighs and she straddled his waist wither either leg spread over his. Her hand reached down passed the hem of his pants and she grabbed onto the bulge as he hissed in strangled excitement, "Do you like this?" She whispered in his ear, her teeth nipping his lobe dangerously, "I think you do."

"Joan, you will be the death of me." He sighed in desperation.

"But I'm not Joan." His eyes snapped open to a beautiful voice that had once tempted him. Sigyn was sitting back, looking weepy as she tore her hands off of his arousal. The basin of water tipped over and the spell was undone. He pushed her back in cold disgust as everything grew faint.

The dream had evaporated from there, and Loki had not realized that he had once again fallen asleep. It had certainly felt very real, and his erection proved that he had been enjoying the naughty treatment. It had been a dream and nothing more of course, which left him with feelings of depression from the pre-coital that had been about to take place in the dark reaches of his mind. Sigyn had prevented that, and he didn't doubt that it had been his own guilt from his heart that put her there. It was a short blessing of course, for he wasn't certain if he wanted to see himself performing that act on Joan, and thinking of his former lover that he had abandoned on Asgard was more than enough to smote that image from arising.

He sat up looking murderous while reaching out for Joan in his mind. She was blocking him just the same as the last enumerable times he had attempted to reach her. It was force of habit, when he needed to discuss something, it was always Joan he turned to, only now that the problem was her and it was a catch-22 in his opinion. He looked down at his clothed formed, the sad erection slowly drooping away as he buried his lust with morose feelings. He wanted Joan hot and bothered for him, just so he wasn't alone in this vast sexual strangeness that he had been enveloped in. It was loneliness that made her so appealing in the first place, and he concluded that lust had struck him simply because she was the first female that he had made innocent contact with in quite a long time, with no thoughts or plans on world domination. It was likely that he would have felt lust even for a more handsome woman if it meant warm company in his drafty bed. He'd pick up again by treating himself to his own desires and that would be enough to vanquish his smoldering heat...but deep down, even he wasn't a good enough liar to believe that.

* * *

**So, kind of a sexy filler as we move on towards the SHIELD visit, I couldn't let you guys go on without knowing how Loki was handling his emotions. The best sponge bath ever given; I think so! So it's not an official lemon, but it is further than I amounted to with LOAN last time, so I hope you all enjoyed the first bit of smut to start off this story. This story takes the turn into Mature from here, and if that isn't your thing, you may want to try my other series. Reviews yeah!**


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